


don't go (where i can't follow)

by raspberryswirl (pinktrixie)



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst, Baby! Catra and Baby! Adora, F/F, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Shadow Weaver | Light Spinner (She-Ra)'s A+ Parenting, Sort Of, Time Travel, Warning for Catra's neverending melodrama about her own mortality, Yes they do, does everyone need therapy?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-03
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:48:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 20,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25051942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinktrixie/pseuds/raspberryswirl
Summary: following shadow weaver's escape, catra's future looks doomed. but with the appearance of her past self and adora, maybe catra can save them and herself.-or-adora and catra work on their issues through the help of their seven year old selves
Relationships: Adora & Catra (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 117
Kudos: 357





	1. time makes you bolder

**Author's Note:**

> so this is set immeadiately after sw takes off, but instead of catra waking up in a cell, well, it'll become clear quickly. 
> 
> i own nothing. 
> 
> title's from the two towers by jrr tolkien  
> chapter title from "landslide" by stevie nicks

Catra let her claws dig idly into the metal walls, a general lack of care permeating her entire being. Everything had crashed down around her. It was only a matter of time before Hordak realized that Shadow Weaver had escaped because Catra was weak, because she was useless. 

She was going to die and nobody would even care to mourn her. Well, maybe Scorpia would. But that was just one more thing that Catra tainted with her darkness. Scorpia represented the only light within the Horde and Catra ruined her. Months ago, she recognized that Scorpia had some silly notion of a crush and she let it continue. It was nice, ya know. To have somebody want you, to look out for you. But she never actively encouraged it. 

No, Catra was too broken for love, too broken for simple affection. Even Scorpia, who was so painfully gentle and thoughtful and kind, elicited a primal response when she touched her. Every fibre of Catra’s being fought against the touch of another. She didn’t deserve anything. 

She veered away from the corridor that would take her directly to her room. Might as well enjoy her last bit of freedom before Hordak inevitably called for her head. 

Would anyone miss her when she was gone? Scorpia would, even though Catra had always kept her at arms’ length. Entrapta barely emerged from her experiments these days long enough to breathe, let alone realize that Catra was gone. 

And Adora, well, that ship sailed long ago. Catra broke their everything. She destroyed it until she thought it would cut into her with every breath. But that only made it worse. Adora hated her. Just like Catra hated her. Adora and her dumb friends would celebrate Catra’s end. Yes, it was for the best. It had to be. Adora could be all bright and shiny and  _ good _ , while Catra slipped into endless darkness. 

It was just like Shadow Weaver had always said,  _ “You will only drag Adora down.” _

Guess that wouldn’t be a problem anymore. Funny, how Shadow Weaver always won. No matter what Catra did or didn’t do, where she hid, where she ran, Shadow Weaver always got her in the end. Catra never won, ever. She had fleeting moments of victory, but they were always stolen away, be it by Adora or Shadow Weaver or just fucking life. There was no victory for Catra in this lifetime. 

Her chest ached painfully, so much so she paused to lean against a wall, rubbing desperately at her breastbone as if to will the pain away. 

She was going to die today. 

She was never going to see Adora again. 

She would never get to tell Adora- 

“No,” she hissed at herself, anger bubbling over. “No, don’t.” 

But thoughts of Adora pushed their way to the forefront of her mind. Adora’s bright blue eyes that always found hers no matter where they were. Her stupid smile that made Catra’s heart hurt. Her dumb voice and her dumb ideas. Her laugh, her laugh that Catra could just barely remember. All she could hear was Adora’s screams of pain as she raked her claws down her back or her screams when she realized that Catra had kidnapped her new friends. The friends that she clearly valued more than Catra. 

Why couldn’t Catra remember her laugh? It had been perfect. 

But like everything else, it was gone. 

A peal of youthful laughter rang out down a side corridor, causing Catra’s head to snap towards the sound. It sounded almost like, but it wasn’t. 

And there shouldn’t be any cadets in this area. 

Catra moved silently towards the hallway, which she was fairly positive was a dead end. But when she turned the corner, the space was deserted. Her eyes flicked up towards the vent where a small tail curled back into the vent. 

A tail? Who else had a tail like that? 

Casting a furtive glance over her shoulder, Catra hauled herself into the vents. Admittedly, it had been a while since she moved through the vents, but she knew them like the back of her hand. 

A shuffling noise drew her attention forward and she crawled along the vents towards the source. 

“‘Dora, c’mon, focus.” 

“‘m tryin’, kitty, you’re goin’ too fast!”

At the sound of the small voices, Catra’s heart stuttered, her breath catching uncomfortably in her chest. It was just a hallucination. She was going crazy. It was inevitable, of course. Or maybe this was some more magic bullshit like in that stupid temple.

She clearly was projecting voices in her head because she missed Adora. No, she didn’t miss Adora, she missed the memory of Adora. That would explain it. 

Two distinct thuds echoed back up the vents, one barely discernible even with her superior hearing, the other almost masked by the yelp of pain. Catra pushed forward until the top of her head was just hanging out of the vent. 

Sure enough, little her and little Adora huddled together as she checked out a bruise on Adora’s elbow. 

“You’ve just gotta land on your feet next time, ‘Dora.” The little version of her wiped at little Adora’s cheeks, sticking out her tongue in an attempt to make little Adora laugh. The sound of that laugh nearly brought tears to Catra’s eyes. “Hey! What’re you doing here?” A set of mismatched eyes stared up at her, the little one’s mouth falling open as they stared back. 

Catra scrambled back in the vent. A hallucination shouldn’t be able to see her. Not really. Right? Stars, this magic stuff sucked. Had she finally lost it, like Shadow Weaver always said she would? Always said she was no better than an animal. 

“Hey, you look like me.” The little version of her, the hallucination, popped up in the mouth of the vent, her eyes squinted nearly shut. 

“You can see me?” 

“Uh, duh, dummy. Why do you look like me?” 

“Catra! What are you doing?” 

“Talking to the lady in the vents!” The younger Catra yelled back, her voice bouncing loudly. 

“Hordak, keep your voice down, moron,” Catra hissed. “What are you two doing?” 

The little Catra looked away from her for a moment before hauling herself into the vent. “Um, hiding from Shadow Weaver.” 

“No, duh.” 

“Catra!” came Adora’s shrill voice, even louder than before. 

Catra grabbed the little version of her, shoving her behind her. Bracing her feet against the sides of the vents, she let her upper body hang down. “Okay, look, Adora, I need you to keep it down okay. I’ll give you a lift and we’ll sort this out.” 

“Catra?” Adora called warily, taking a half step towards Catra. 

“Don’t trust her! She’s a grown-up!” called back little Catra, who was apparently a total brat. Catra kicked out at her, making solid contact with herself? Well, she kicked the little Catra, who let out an angry hiss. 

Catra motioned with one hand to the little blonde, tamping down her irritation with the older version. “Come here.” Adora shuffled forwards slightly, just beyond Catra’s reach. A noise startled both of them outside the door. There was a quiet tune being whistled and the jangle of keys. “Adora, seriously, come here.” 

“I don’t know you.” 

“I’m a Force Captian and I’m giving you a direct order,” she said in a desperate attempt to appeal to the girl’s intense loyalty and respect for superior officers. Well, the loyalty that existed at that age. 

“Really?” Adora cast a doubtful look her way, one that Catra was all too familiar with. But she could deal with her issues with Adora later. After she dealt with the weird hallucinations that were apparently solid. And there wasn’t really a later for her anyway, so whatever. 

“Yes, really, now come here.” Adora took another half-step forward, which was just enough to allow Catra to grab her shirt and all but toss her up into the vent. She had barely gotten little Adora up when the door swung open and a maintenance woman appeared. 

“Coulda swore I heard something,” the woman muttered to herself before shaking her head and getting back to work. 

Catra exhaled sharply as she dragged little Adora with her. Little Catra, naturally, was less inclined to stay with an unknown adult and had wandered off in the vents. She could faintly smell the girl, but it was hard to distinguish from her own scent. “I’m going to kill myself when I get her, me, whatever,” hissed Catra. “Catra, Catra, this is so not the time for this.” A tail flicked out of sight behind a bend. Glancing over her shoulder to make sure she still had little Adora, Catra took off after the increasingly irritating version of her. 

She managed to snag a fleeing ankle, pulling the girl back towards her. Little Catra dug her claws into the metal, but they weren’t quite strong enough yet to stop her. She kicked out a foot, catching Catra in the ear. 

“Catra, stop, stop.” 

“Let me go! I don’t wanna go to Shadow Weaver! Please!” Catra let the girl roll onto her back but grabbed her shoulders before she could do any more harm. “I’ll be good, I swear.” 

What was left of Catra’s broken heart crumbled in her chest at the look of terror in her younger self’s eyes. How many times had she tried to hide from Shadow Weaver and her magic, only to be caught out and desperately plead to not be turned in. But nobody ever looked out for the weird, scrawny kid with ears. Everyone was infinitely more scared of Shadow Weaver than her and in the Horde, only those with a strong survival instinct make it. 

Hey, hey, I’m not taking you to that bitch. Not in a million years. I’m taking you guys somewhere safe so we can sort this all out.” She hesitated for a moment, relaxing back and giving the girl some space. “I promise I’ll keep you safe, just like Adora.” 

“Promise?” 

“Yeah, kid, I promise.” Catra swallowed against the painful lump forming in her throat. The little girl in front of her just so desperately wanted someone to protect her, to save her. 

“Catra?” 

“Yeah,” both versions answered, moving to look at little Adora. Their heads snapped back to look at each other. 

“I’ll explain later. We need to figure this out. And I’m on a bit of a tight schedule at the moment.” Her breath caught in her chest at the thought of her looming fate. If Hordak knew what had happened, it was only a matter of time before he came after her. And that would be it for her. “Let’s get out of these vents.”

Little Catra dropped down easily, but little Adora refused to move, her tiny hands clutching at the sides of the vent. 

Fighting the urge to roll her eyes, Catra lowered herself down, holding her arms up for Adora. “Adora, just jump into my arms, I’ll catch you, I swear.” 

Little Adora’s eyes flickered between her arms and little Catra before nodding abruptly. “1, 2, 3!” Little Adora launched herself out of the vent, managing to kick Catra in the face in the process, but Catra still managed to steady them. 

“I suppose I kinda deserve that these days,” she mumbled under her breath as she set little Adora down. The two little girls rushed to each others’ side, their hands naturally falling together. Catra gave herself a little shake. It didn’t matter anymore. “Okay, right. We’re gonna go back to my room and we’ll figure out how you guys got here. I need you two to stay as stealthy as possible.” The last thing she needed was Hordak finding these two little girls. An idea surfaced as to keep the girls quiet, but it made her skin crawl. But her issues weren’t important right now. “Stay quiet so Shadow Weaver doesn’t find us, okay?” 

The look of pure terror that appeared in her younger self’s eyes caused a wave of nausea to nearly overtake her, but she pushed it down. She couldn’t even bring herself to watch as little Adora pulled little Catra closer as if her arms could protect them from the world. 

“Alright, follow me.” 

“Yes, Force Captain.” Adora half-heartedly saluted, her bottom lip trembling. 

A smile curved up both Catra’s faces at that. Catra beckoned them forward, moving quietly towards the end of the corridor. 

“D’ya hear that, ‘Dora, I’m a Force Captain!” 

Catra wheeled on them, her eyes flashing dangerously. “What did I just say?” 

“Stealthy as possible, ma’am,” responded little Adora while little Catra just rolled her eyes. Catra bit back a chuckle at that. She couldn’t wait to tell Adora… oh wait, she was most likely going to die. In like an hour. Never mind. No more telling Adora anything. 

“Suck up,” coughed little Catra. 

“Both of you, quiet.” The odd trio moved down another set of corridors before they encountered another person. Little Catra was quick to blend into the shadows, but Adora let out a yelp of fear, freezing in the middle of the hallway. Catra scooped her into her arms, pressing them against the cold steel. Little Catra’s tail wrapped nervously around the older one’s leg while her claws caught against Catra’s trousers. 

Meanwhile, little Adora’s hands clutched at her hair as she pressed her face into Catra’s neck. Catra squeezed her eyes shut as the familiar smell of Adora washed over her. Catra kept them as close to the small corner formed by the thick pipes, providing some cover. If they were lucky, it would just be the typical Horde goons, who were generally clueless anyway. 

Two guards stomped down the hallway, chatting amongst themselves when their radio chimed. “Alert level 3, Hordak wants Force Captain Catra in his chambers. She is not to leave the building.” 

One of the guards spoke into it, “Affirmative, we’ll find the brat.” 

His companion chuckled darkly, “Wonder what Hordak wants with that mongrel?” 

“Fuck if I know. She has it coming.” 

Catra’s claws curled into her free hand, nearly breaking the skin. Another set of claws bit into her legs as her younger self let out an almost feral hiss. She could feel the little girl starting to move out of the shadows, and there was little she could do with Adora in her arms. Desperately, she let out a low, warning trill, hoping the somehow it would make sense to the girl. Little Catra started slightly at the noise, but settled back into the darkness. 

Once the men turned the corner, Catra motioned for her to follow her. She almost set little Adora down before deciding that it would be faster just to carry her. Adora, especially at that age, had an unfortunate habit of stomping around even if she was trying to be stealthy. Catra forced away the slight feeling of relief she got from holding Adora again, even if she was like seven or whatever, as they hurried down the corridors. 

They passed another set of patrols, the three of them crammed in a supply closet. Little Catra had started to sneeze, but Catra covered her mouth and nearly smacked little her when she bit into her hand. 

Finally, after what felt like a lifetime, they made it to her room. Clearly, someone had been looking for her already. Every item was upturned and tossed about, even the files that Scorpia had meticulously organized for her. Because obviously that would be where she was hiding. She rolled her eyes at the incompetence of Hordak’s goons. At least she was intelligent despite what Shadow Weaver had always said. 

Settling the two girls on her destroyed bed, she set about packing a bag. She needed to get out of the Fright Zone, and fast. Hordak didn’t make it a habit of listening to his failed underlings and if he found the little girls, she shuddered to think what he’d do with them. Well, at least do with little her, little Adora might be fine based on the leverage she’d provide. 

“How old are you two right now?” She asked as she stuffed as many blankets into a rucksack. 

The two glanced nervously at each other before Adora answered, “Six, maybe seven? Shadow Weaver only tells me when I’m a year older, so I dunno about Catra.” 

Catra exhaled slowly, trying to balance the panic. Now was not the time to deal with her Shadow Weaver complex. “Did anything weird happen before I found you?” 

“Uh...I don’t think so?” 

“There was a weird popping noise. I heard it. I told you, ‘Dora, I have better ears than you.” 

“They’re just bigger than mine.” 

“Kiddos, now isn’t the time for this. How many ration bars do you two have in your pockets?” 

“None!” Little Catra responded instantly, shoving a sharp elbow into Adora’s side. Catra raised one eyebrow at them. “I’ve got four and ‘Dora’s got two.” 

“Clever girls,” Catra said with a grin. The look on her younger self’s face tugged at her, but she had to stay focused. If she didn’t move quickly, none of them would be getting out of here. 

“Are we going somewhere?” Little Adora asked, her hands twisting in her lap. 

“Uh-huh,” Catra hummed as she stuffed both her and Adora’s Horde-issued knifes into the bag before thinking better of it. “Here, take these.” She handed them to the little girls. 

“Force Captain, we’re not allowed knives.” 

“This is sick!” 

“Shush, both of you, unless you wanna get caught.”

“By Shadow Weaver?” Little Catra asked, her voice wavering. 

Catra let out a shuddering breath. “Worse, Hordak.” 

That seemed to shut them both up quickly. Catra glanced around her room once more. It wasn’t as if she had any belongings of her own anyway. Except for some of the silly pictures and notes Scorpia had left her. Crap, Scorpia. There wasn’t time to find her and she was too conspicuous. 

Grabbing one of her many unfinished reports, she scrawled a note out. 

_ Sorry, Scorpia. I have to go. I’ll explain later. I’ll see you again.  _

She hesitated for a long moment before adding,  _ I’ll miss the super pal trio.  _

“You two ready?” The two girls nodded, although little Adora looked terrified that they were leaving while little Catra couldn’t look more thrilled. As they snuck out the room, Catra supposed that this would’ve been her dream at that age. Some mysterious stranger coming and rescuing her from the Horde, taking her away from the darkness. 

After little Adora tripped loudly over a loose screw, Catra picked her up again, hushing her gently as they snuck through the hallways. Adora’s fingers curled around the straps of the rucksack while Catra held her tight with one arm. 

There were even more patrols than before, and if Catra’s instincts were correct, they were all looking for her. She just had to get to the hanger and they’d be fine. Where they’d go after that? She wasn’t sure. 

As they reached the hanger, Catra keyed in her code with her free hand, glancing over her shoulder for any incoming guards. Once the door slid open, she set little Adora down. 

“Okay, I’m going in first and then you two run for the first skiff on the left. Keep quiet and keep to the shadows. Don’t let anyone catch you.” 

“What are you gonna do?” Little Adora stared up at her with those damned blue eyes and Catra’s chest ached. 

Catra let a smirk twist her mouth. “I’m going to make sure nobody can follow us.” 

“Are you sure we should be running away?” 

“Yes, Adora, it’s the only way to keep you two, and me, alive at this point. Don’t worry it’ll be fine.” 

“Yeah, ‘Dora, it’ll be fine,” her younger self mimicked with an eyeroll. 

Catra crouched down to their level. “And, if it looks like I’m not gonna get out of here, you two take the skiff and go. Head towards Brightmoon.” The pair’s eyes went round as saucers. “Ask for She-ra. She’ll take care of you.” 

“Brightmoon? But, but there’s princesses there.” Little Adora’s mouth fell open in abject horror. Catra wished she could’ve gotten a photo just to rub it in her, er, present Adora’s face. 

“It’ll be fine, kiddos.” She winked at them over her shoulder before sneaking into the hanger. Checking briefly to make sure the little ones had actually listened to her, she turned back towards the small number of Horde soldiers hanging about. After watching little her help Adora onto the skiff, Catra made her way to the control office. 

As she suspected, Hordak struggled to control the day-to-day operations without his second-in-command, so no one had removed her credentials from the system. With a few keystrokes, she locked the landing gears on the rest of the skiffs and was in the process of disabling the guidances systems of the larger vessels when the door burst open. 

“Ha! Knew I’d find you in here! Always were a coward, huh, kitty cat?” Octavia loomed in the doorway, her one good eye gleaming with perverse pleasure. 

“Hey, Octavia, how’re things looking these days?” Catra backed off the control panel, but not without tearing at the guidance system with her claws. “Are you sure you want to do this? You’ve only got one eye left.” 

Octavia let out a scream before lunging at Catra. Catra launched herself over the older woman, managing to scrape her claws along the top of her head in the process. She darted out of the control room but found the small group of guards waiting for her with an unfortunate assortment of stun sticks and guns. 

“Aw crap.” 

Her eyes darted around the room, but it was too open. There wasn’t much in the way of barriers to stop a well-placed blaster shot. She was screwed. This was it. 

“Hands up, traitor,” one of the men yelled, brandishing his gun violently. 

In that split second, Catra decided it would be better to go out fighting than however Hordak wanted to torture her. She started to lunge towards the guards when a tentacle caught her around the neck. She thrashed desperately against Octavia, her claws slashing at whatever she could reach. 

“What are you morons waiting for, shoot her!” Octavia screamed as she pulled Catra into a headlock. “Aw, look, mongrel, there’s no one here to save you now. Your dumb little girlfriend’s not he-” 

_ Boom!  _

The ground shook violently as one of the tanks went off. The shot seemed to land just in the middle of the guards, scattering them. Muffled curses and cries of pain echoed in the hanger. 

Catra sunk her teeth into one of Octavia’s tentacles with as much force as she could muster, causing the woman to drop her. She spat out the chunk of tentacle she had taken with her in disgust. 

“Wooohooo! Told you I could use a tank, ‘Dora!” Catra’s focus snapped to the tank that had fired and sure enough, there the little version of her was peering out of the tank. “Hey, you guys!” She called to the disoriented guards. Those who were still standing turned to face the seven-year-old in the tank only to be immediately hit with another barrage. 

“I swear to whoever, I’m going to kill that girl,” Catra hissed as she bounded across the hanger, avoiding the guards lying prone on the ground. “Catra, get out of the damned tank!” 

“This is so cool!” 

Catra scaled the tank easily, grabbing the little girl by the scruff of her neck and pulling her from the tank. “You can play with tanks when you’re older.” Catra tucked her under her arm and ran as fast as she could towards the skiff, but it was so far away and the kid was slowing her down. 

An impact behind her nearly singed off her tail as she leapt forward to avoid the projectiles from what had to have been a grenade launcher. Searing heat curled up her spine as a skiff she sprinted past caught alight. 

Octavia stumbled forward, a frighteningly large gun in her remaining tentacles. With a fearsome scowl on her face, she aimed it towards Catra. Her heart skipped a beat as she tried to speed up. Then Octavia moved it towards the skiff and Catra’s heart practically stopped. 

“Adora! Get going! Go! Take off!” She screamed, veering off towards where she hoped the skiff would end up. Thankfully, as always, Adora was very prepared and the skiff slightly unsteadily moved out of the hanger. 

It was floating just a few feet out of the hanger, but if Catra mistimed the jump, she and her little self would have a very long drop down and even a cat can’t land on her feet from that height. 

She could vaguely hear her little self whimpering under her arm while Octavia’s gun revved up behind them. With a short inhale, Catra launched herself at the skiff, digging her three sets of remaining claws into the metal with a groan. Barely steadying herself, she let her younger self go and shoved little Adora off the rudder. Pushing all her weight into the rudder, she forced the skiff to drop elevation rapidly in time for Octavia’s projectile to whistle past their heads into the muck of the Fright Zone. 

The two girls clutched at each other desperately, their eyes shimmering with tears as Catra pressed on the gas. The skiff shuddered momentarily before shooting forward. 

Her breath didn’t even out until they reached the empty green space that divided the Fright Zone from that stupid forest. They just had to get into the forest and then they’d be safe. 

“Old me let me drive a tank! Can you believe it, ‘Dora?” Little Catra was the first to speak as the skiff sped over the land, her hands still clutching at little Adora’s shirt. 

Catra bit her cheek at the memory of saying almost those exact same words to the present day Adora last year. These two were so innocent and happy. And everything would eventually go wrong and they’d want to kill each other. 

While Catra would want to kill Adora, but she wasn’t sure if Adora actually felt the same way. It sure seemed like she did when she went all glowy giant lady, but just plain Adora… that was a different story. Catra shook her head violently. That wasn’t important. What was important was getting the kids away from the Fright Zone. Even the thought of what Hordak might have done if he had discovered the younger versions of his failed second-in-command and the princess who had been tormenting his forces was darker than Catra wanted to let her mind go. He lacked the delicate manipulation of Shadow Weaver, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t cause a world of hurt. 

“I didn’t let you drive a tank, you dummy. You just went ahead and started firing.” 

“Well, Octavia is a dumb face.” 

Catra chuckled, steering the skiff towards the forest, “That she is, kid. That she is.” 


	2. even children get older

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra goes camping with the kids and has a lot of feelings that she doesn't want.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one thing to note: catra has a bit of a moment about dying towards the end, it's not very major, but just fair warning.

Night fell as they entered the Whispering Forest, long shadows creeping around them. Catra suppressed the urge to quiver in fear at them. She wasn’t afraid of shadows anymore. (At least that’s what she kept telling herself in the dead of night.) 

Unfortunately, the same could not be said for the two little girls. Little Catra flinched at the shadows that seemed to reach out for them, turning her face into little Adora’s shirt. Little Adora seemed to be equally afraid of the strange noises around them. 

Catra fought to keep a straight face when a flock of birds burst out of the tree and almost hit her in the face. She settled for a threatening hiss that seemed to drive them away. 

“So like, you’re me, yeah?” The little version of her piped up from her place wrapped in little Adora’s arms. 

Tamping down a strange feeling of jealousy at the sight, Catra replied, “I guess. Honestly, all this magic shit gives me a headache.” 

“Magic?” Both girls gasped, their eyes wide with terror. 

Catra shrugged halfheartedly as she navigated them further into the forest. She vaguely aimed them towards where the princesses’ palace was. They’d be better equipped to help two little kids than Catra. Catra didn’t even like little kids. At least, Adora did. “Yeah, magic seems to explain everything.” 

“Like Shadow Weaver’s magic?” came her small voice. 

“I don’t think Shadow Weaver’s behind this, considering she was locked up at the time. But there’s a lot of this magic stuff going around these days. All sorts of weird princess stuff and magic swords and everything.” 

“Shadow Weaver’s locked up?” 

“Princesses?” 

Catra focused on little Adora’s question first. “Yup, all sorts of princesses. There’s Sparkles and the flower chick and the one who does freaky things with water.” Catra shuddered at the thought. 

“You’ve fought princesses?” Little Adora asked, her mouth falling open in awe. “That’s so cool! Catra, d’you hear? Fighting princesses!” 

Catra chuckled to herself at little Adora’s excitement. This was the Adora she knew, the one who wanted to share the world with her and didn’t have time for all the princessing and whatnot. This Adora held her close and tried to protect her. Present-day Adora couldn’t give a shit about Catra these days. 

“I’ve fought all the princesses. Even beat ‘em a few times.” The sight of Adora in all her glowing glory hunched over after having her claws imbedded in her back flashed before her eyes. That counted as beating her, right? She definitely didn’t feel like she was going to be sick afterwards. She definitely didn’t cry herself to sleep for a month afterwards. 

“What about Shadow Weaver?” Little Catra asked in a soft tone, almost trembling. 

Catra squeezed her eyes shut. She hated how scared she was at that age. At least she had grown out of that. Kind of. At least Shadow Weaver was gone. 

“She was locked up.  _ I  _ locked her up. But she escaped. That’s why Hordak sent those people after me. But I’m the one who beat her.” Her hands shook slightly on the rudder, but she managed to keep it steady. “I was the one who was strong. And she still…” Her throat seized up painfully. “She still didn’t choose me.” The last words came out so softly she doubted either of the kids could hear her. Or rather, she hoped her younger self didn’t hear it. 

“You, uh, I mean, I beat Shadow Weaver. Holy Hordak! I beat Shadow Weaver!” Little Catra leapt to her feet, flinging herself at her older self’s legs. Catra laughed loudly, the sound echoing in the quiet forest. “This is the best day ever.” Catra glanced down at her little face, those heterochromatic eyes alight with joy. She wasn’t sure if she had ever been that happy in her entire childhood. Maybe this was the one good thing she’d ever do. 

Her eyes strained to see much further than a bit in front of the skiff, as if the forest was making it darker so even her eyes couldn’t make out what was in front of her. 

“How about we set up camp for the night?” she asked as she slowed the skiff in front of a tree with spindly branches almost forming a ceiling. Helping both girls down, she set about making a little campsite for the three of them. For a moment, she debated having them find firewood, but thought better of it given what happened the last time they had separated in these woods. She tossed her pack to little Adora. “Set up some beds with those. I’ll grab some wood.” 

She crossed the small clearing in search of fallen branches, trying to suppress the painful ache in her chest. 

She had finally left the Horde. There was no going back now. She’d be shot on sight. There was nothing for her there. To be frank, there was nothing for her anywhere. Maybe she’d just live in the woods, finally acting like the feral animal everyone always told her she was. Or she’d go to the Crimson Wastes and disappear. 

But for now, she needed to take care of those two and get them to people who could fix this situation. And the best person for that, unfortunately, was Adora and her princess friends. 

She cast a glance to the little kids who were giggling happily as they made a nest for themselves. Stars, she missed not sleeping alone. Until Adora left, the only times Catra had slept alone were during Shadow Weaver’s punishments when she slept in the cells. And even then, she was in too much pain to really know she was alone. 

But now, she just tossed and turned, always seeking a warmth that wasn’t there. 

As these thoughts ran through her mind, she gathered an armful of sticks. A screaming peal of laughter startled her. 

Little Catra sat on top of little Adora’s chest, her hands on her hips. The two were giggling happily, little Adora tickling at her sides. 

“Hey Catra!” Little Adora called to her as she reached the skiff. “Are you still ticklish?” She wiggled her fingers threateningly even as little Catra kept her pinned to the ground. 

“If you come near me, I will claw your face off,” replied Catra evenly, dropping the wood on the ground. “Split a ration bar if you’re hungry, but I don’t know how long we’ll be in the woods.” 

“I’m not hungry,” little Catra declared, shoving a ration bar into Adora’s hands. 

“Yes, you are, dummy. Just eat the bar. I don’t wanna have to carry you around all day tomorrow.” The pair of them stared at each other, but the older one won in the end. 

“Aren’t you hungry?” asked little Catra through a mouthful of ration bar. 

Her stomach twisted at the thought of food, but not from hunger, but from anxiety. And anyway, she was used to being hungry, the little one didn’t have the same years of practice. Little Catra’s brow furrowed, but she didn’t ask any more questions. 

As the two girls ate, Catra began to build a fire, fishing an older lighter out of her bag. 

“Whoa,” hummed little Adora, her eyes fixed on the flames, “it’s so pretty.” 

Little Catra, in true form, reached a hand out to touch it, yelping as a spark landed in her fur. 

“Don’t touch it, it’s hot,” said Catra, monotone. “Now, go to bed, you two. We’re walking tomorrow.” 

“We’re not taking the skiff anymore?” 

“They’ll be able to track it that thing anywhere once Entrapta’s on it. I’m not taking any chances. Seriously. Bed, now.” Little her looked like she wanted to argue until little Adora brushed her fingers gently. 

Each girl settled into their own pile of blankets, just far enough that they weren’t connected, but close enough that they could almost press their fingers together. 

Memories pressed at the back of Catra’s eyes of how many times they had been punished (or rather,  _ she  _ had) for sharing a bed. Shadow Weaver’s figure looming over their bunk, cold fingers curling around Catra’s wrist, pulling her from Adora’s side. 

“Hey,” her voice cracked unfortunately on the word, “you guys can share if you want.” 

The hope that bloomed in their faces would’ve been adorable if it wasn’t so tragic. 

In seconds, little Catra piled all of her blankets in with little Adora’s. The two girls burrowed into the blankets, little Catra’s head tucked against little Adora’s chest. Little Adora fell asleep almost instantly, but little Catra’s eyes remained half open even as little Adora sleepily petted her ears. 

“Aren’t you gonna sleep?” 

“Somebody’s gotta keep watch. Go to sleep, kitten.” 

Little Catra watched her intently until her eyes couldn’t stay open any longer. 

Once the little ones were both asleep, Catra let herself relax back and stare up at the empty sky. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt so alone. In the Fright Zone, there was always noise, guards chatting or the rumble of bots moving through the halls or just the weird noises all the pipes made. The Whispering Forest certainly lived up to its name. It felt like something was about to sneak up on her at any moment. Wind whistled through the trees, amplifying every noise. 

Catra had no sense of how much time had passed, just waiting for something to spring out of the woods. The moon had shifted a bit, but Catra never had any formal forest survival training. Apparently it was covered in Force Captain training. 

“Hey Catra,” hissed a voice right next to her ear. Catra started, swinging out with her claws. Luckily, little Catra had good reflexes and ducked in time. “Ha! I’m faster than you.” 

“No, you’re not, I just didn’t want to hit you.” 

“You’re not a very good watch then, huh?” 

“What do you want?” Catra groaned, pushing herself into a seated position. 

Little Catra folded in on herself in front of Catra, her arms curled around her knees, her tail looped around her arm. “Um, was just wondering….” 

“Wondering…? Just ask what you wanna ask. I don’t want to have to carry you all day tomorrow.” 

Little Catra stared intently at her knees. “Where’s your Adora?” 

“She’s not  _ my  _ Adora,” Catra all but hissed, tension surging up her spine. And as it turned out, she never was. Little Catra shrunk back at the harshness, tears springing to her eyes. “It’s complicated. Life’s not fair.” 

“Is she dead?” 

Catra’s heart stopped. Even the thought of Adora dead hurt. Sure, she had tried more than most. But it had never succeeded. Was that because Adora was just better than her? Or, or, was it because Catra could never actually kill Adora? A traitorous voice whispered in her ear, sounding an awful lot like Adora. 

Her claws dug into her forearm, the pain grounding her. 

“No, she’s not dead.” 

“Really? I just thought… ya know, if you’re a Force Captain, then something musta happened to Adora. Shadow Weaver always, always said…” 

“That Adora was special, that she was destined for leadership.” Catra finished the thought, a strange prickling in her fingertips. “And I’m cannon fodder…” 

“Just an animal,” murmured little Catra, a few tears spilling down her cheeks. 

“Hey, hey, kid, don’t listen to her. She’s wrong about me, er, us.” Catra reached out tentatively for her younger self, pausing when the little girl flinched. “It’s okay. I’m going to take care of you. I promise.” At those words, little Catra let her touch her, desperately pressing into it. “I promise,” she repeated as little Catra moved to curl into her side. 

“So if Adora’s not dead, where is she?” 

“You’ll see. That’s where we’re headed.” 

“Are you not friends with her anymore? We said it’d always be the two of us. I don’t want Adora to leave. She can’t leave me. I won’t leave her!” 

A sob bubbled in her chest, but she tamped it down. “Take it easy, kitten, your Adora’s still here.” Catra brushed her fingers over little Catra’s head, letting them tease gently over her ear tufts. “It’s okay. I’ve got you.” A small purr rumbled out of little Catra’s chest, vibrating against Catra. She surprised herself by letting a returning purr. 

“What’re you two doin’? ‘m cold.” Both looked up abruptly to find little Adora rubbing at her eyes as she stood to her feet. “Kitty, you left,” Little Adora said with a pout. 

The nickname tore at Catra’s chest, leeching into her broken heart. Not long after they were this age, Adora had stopped calling her that. Her own terrified screams at Adora after an overnight session with Shadow Weaver as Adora had tried to hold her and calm her down before someone found them echoed in her head. She hadn’t done anything wrong. She hadn’t. But Shadow Weaver had held her with her magic, calling out to her,  _ “Here, kitty, kitty.”  _ Adora had called her kitty once more as she let Catra cry and Catra lashed out, catching Adora’s chin. Shadow Weaver stole her away again and Adora never called her kitty again. 

As Catra sunk further into memory, little Adora had crawled into her lap next to little Catra. The added weight and warmth jarred Catra out of thoughts of that dark magic coursing around her. 

The little girls wrapped themselves in a blanket, their fingers entwined together, pressing back into Catra’s body. 

As their breathing evened out, Catra couldn’t help but sink into the warmth of the contact. It had been  _ so  _ long since someone touched her for longer than a moment. 

xx 

Frequently, Catra wondered how her life had gotten to where it was. Most of the time, that thought came as she fought Adora, or more specifically She-ra. 

This time also had to do with Adora, sort of. 

“Hey! Watch the ears!” Catra yelped as a chubby hand pulled on one of her ears. With one hand, she pulled little Adora off her shoulders, dangling in her in front of her. 

“Sorry, Catra,” drawled little Adora, her eyes bright with mischief. With an eye roll, Catra set little Adora on her feet. 

Catra cast her gaze upwards to check where little Catra was playing in the trees. She could hear her, but not see her. Eh, she was probably fine. 

Little Adora fell into step beside her, almost automatically reaching for her hand. Catra hesitated for a moment, her ribcage aching, before letting their fingers slot together. 

The pair of them walked in silence through the woods, the only sounds the occasional creak of a branch as little Catra lept from tree to tree. 

After what might have been an hour of walking, little Catra dropped from a tree a bit in front of them, scaring little Adora enough to send her scrambling behind Catra’s legs. 

Little Catra grinned at them with bloody teeth, feathers and sticks embedded in her hair. “Hey, ‘Dora.” Her eyes flickered to her older self momentarily as a blush covered her cheeks. “I got you somethin’.” Catra then noticed the way she was holding her hands behind her back. “And you too,” she addressed her older self, her cheeks turning almost red. 

Catra let go of little Adora’s hand as little Catra bounded over to them. Hesitating for a moment, little Catra then held out her hands for each of them, a dead song bird in each. 

Catra choked on air for a moment before schooling her features. “Uh, thanks, kid.” 

“They taste soooo good, Adora! You’ve gotta try.” 

Little Adora began to reach forward, but Catra stopped her. Both girls stared up at her with wide eyes. “Er, kitten, that’ll make Adora sick.” 

Little Catra’s face crumpled, tears appearing in the corners of her eyes. Without another word, little Catra turned on her heel and sprinted back into the woods. 

“Crap,” hissed Catra. She turned to little Adora, grabbing her shoulder. “You stay here. Do not move. Do not make a sound. If something comes, then scream as loud as you can. I’ll go get, uh, Catra.” 

“But I can help find her! I’m good at finding her.” 

“I know, kid, but she’s probably up a tree now or something. This’ll be faster.” Catra almost let little Adora come with her after she pouted dramatically, but now wasn’t the time for her soft heart. 

Catra squeezed her shoulder tightly once more. Then, she sprinted after little Catra, praying the girl hadn’t gotten too far. She kept her ears pricked, desperate for a sign of the little girl. 

“Catra, please. This isn’t safe.” Catra scaled a low hanging tree in an effort to increase visibility. “Kitten, come back. You can’t just run away here. It’s not safe.” 

A broken sob came from one of the trees in front of her. 

“You said I was gonna hurt Adora.”

Catra lept up to the tree, hanging on a branch below her little self. Little Catra sat with her back against the trunk, curled into the smallest ball possible. Her tail whipped back and forth anxiously. 

“Kitten, that’s not what I said.” 

“I don’t wanna hurt Adora. She’s my friend.” 

“I know that. I’m you, remember?” 

“You don’t have an Adora. That’s what you said.” 

A shot to the chest wouldn’t have hurt so badly. Her younger self had managed to find that old, festering wound and hit it hard. 

“Yeah, well, life isn’t sunshine and rainbows, is it?” She snarled, only catching herself at the end. She knew the kid was just scared, but god, did her heart always hurt like this? She pulled herself up onto the branch so she was facing herself. Little Catra hissed at her, which Catra easily returned. “Settle down, kitten.” 

“Adora loves me. We protect each other. I’m not hurting her.” 

Catra sighed heavily. This was a favourite tactic of Shadow Weaver’s when she was small. Punish her for every mistake she or Adora made and then tell her she was hurting Adora, that she was dragging her down. Stars, Catra couldn’t even be good enough for herself. Was she so broken that she couldn’t help herself? 

“I just wanted to give her something,” mumbled little Catra into her knees. 

Catra let her tail rest between them, almost brushing little Catra’s toes. “I know. You bring her that mouse yet?” 

“Mouse! Where?” 

“Eh, I’ll tell you later. But I get it. I used to bring my Adora presents too. But thing is, you and me, kid, we’re different from Adora and the others. One thing Shadow Weaver’s not wrong about. Eating that bird tastes good to you, but to Adora, it’ll make her sick. It’s part of being a hybrid. Our bodies are different. Like Scorpia loves eating bugs because of her whole scorpion thing.” 

“You know a scorpion, named Scorpia?” 

Catra scoffed, “You do realize, we’re a cat hybrid, and our name is Catra, right?” 

“Whatever,” little Catra grumbled, rolling her eyes dramatically. 

“Look, I know you weren’t trying to hurt Adora. And kid, don’t listen to Shadow Weaver. You’ve always been a good friend to Adora. It’s not your fault.” 

“Then where is your Adora?” 

“She’s-” An ear-piercing scream cut off Catra’s fumbling reply. “Oh fuck, Adora.” 

“You left her?” Little Catra screeched. 

“You ran off! It doesn’t matter, we need to go.” The pair of them scrambled down the tree. Without a word, Catra slung little Catra onto her back. “Hold on tight.” 

Catra took off at full speed towards the spot she had left her. They burst through the trees to find little Adora facing off with one of Entrapta’s robots. A series of scorch marks lined the ground where little Adora must have been. 

“Fuck, go get Adora and hide, I’ll deal with the robot.” Little Catra dropped off her back seamlessly while Catra moved directly towards the robot. “Hey, you there! Over here!” She waved her arms about, desperate to get the robot’s focus away from the girls. The robot turned slowly, the light blinking rapidly. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as little Catra pulled little Adora into a bush. She hoped they’d actually stay put this time. 

Almost a moment too late, she lept out of the way as the robot firing a shot at her. 

“Identification: Force Captain Catra. Code: Sierra-Papa-Tango 3138!” She yelp as she slid under the robot, tearing at its underbelly. 

“Identification accepted.” 

“Stand down!” Catra yelped as she jumped on top of it in an effort to dodge its projectiles. “Stand down!” 

“You do not have authorization.” 

Catra let out a long curse as the robot tried to buck her off. She drove her claws into its top to steady herself before shoving her hand into the vulnerable camera area. She pulled out as many wires as she could until the robot collapsed on the forest floor. 

“Sorry, Entrapta,” she muttered as she tossed down the mass of wires. “Kids, you can come out now.” 

The two little girls emerged from the bushes, little Adora looking a bit worse for wear. A long scrape crossed one cheek while her trousers were covered in grass stains. Little Catra hovered protectively over her shoulder as Catra checked out her cheek. 

“Might have a bit of a scar,” Catra said, cleaning it best she could with her meagre supplies. “But you’ll live.” 

“Scars are so cool, Adora,” little Catra added, pressing a brief kiss to the wounded cheek. Little Adora’s entire face turned a familiar shade of pink. 

“Thanks, kitty.” Little Adora returned the kiss on little Catra’s cheek and Catra was 100-percent convinced her face had never been that red in her entire life. (Other than all of the other times with Adora, the traitorous voice in her head whispered) 

Catra busied herself with repacking the bag as the two girls whispered. While her back was slightly to them, little Adora snuck up on her and kissed her cheek. “Thank you for saving me.” 

“Uh...sure thing, kid,” managed Catra, only slightly, completely embarrassed by her reaction. “We better keep going. We’re still probably a day or two out from where we’re going. Especially considering this freakin’ forest hates me,” she added under her breath. 

She motioned with one hand and the two little ones fell into step with her easily. Absently, she supposed there was some benefit to military training for seven-year-olds; at least it made them easier to wrangle in a magic forest. 

“Cap’n Catra,” called little Adora from one side, “why does the forest hate you?” 

“Uh, ‘cause it’s the Whispering Forest.” 

Both girls yelped in fear. “But, aren’t there princesses in here?” Adora asked, shifting closer to Catra nervously. 

Catra winced slightly as little Catra climbed up her body, claws digging into her side. “We have the might Force Captain Catra to protect us!” Little Catra settled on Catra’s shoulder, her hands buried in her hair. Catra bit into her cheek as her younger self pulled hard on her hair to maintain her balance. 

Little Adora giggled, tugging on Catra’s arm until their fingers were interlaced. 

“I know that you’ll protect us.” 

“Always, kid.” 

xx 

It had been nearly four days since they had fled the Fright Zone and it seemed the forest was neverending. In particular, it didn’t like Catra or even her younger self. Little Adora, on the other hand, seemed to have a way with the forest and kept correcting their direction. Of course, even without the stupid magic sword, Adora was special. 

Catra tamped down the bubbling resentment that had taken up residence a year ago. She didn’t have a problem with a seven-year-old. That was pathetic. That was weak. She had a problem with nineteen-year-old Adora. She had a problem with She-ra. She didn’t have a problem with a seven-year-old who didn’t know what she’d do at a later date. A seven-year-old who looked at her best friend like she was the whole world and held her hand and made sure she was safe. That was the Adora Catra was mourning. That was the one Catra missed like someone had taken a piece of her. 

She hooked her thumbs into the straps of the rucksack, watching the two girls running slightly ahead. They had made up some sort of racing game that morning and somehow weren’t completely tired yet. Carta simultaneously looked forward to and dreaded that point. Her entire body ached from the hike through the woods plus the fact that she had been carrying each of the girls on and off and she felt like she could sleep forever. 

“‘Dora, I’ll give you a headstart! Betcha can’t even beat me then!” Little Catra yelled as she hung from a low hanging tree branch. Without a word, little Adora took off, but stopped just before she passed a massive tree. “If you stop, you can’t win, dummy!” 

“There’s something up there! Like a shiny building!” 

Catra jogged to catch up with little Adora and sure enough, there was Bright Moon in all its stupid, shiny, princessy glory. Almost involuntarily, a sharp exhale fell from her lips. Never thought she’d be thrilled to see the headquarters of the Rebellion, at least not without an army at her back. 

“Whoa,” little Catra gasped behind her. “Is that where we’re going?” 

“Yup. But we’ve gotta wait a bit. It’s almost dark, then I’ll go and get who we need.” 

Little Adora wandered back towards them, her little face glowing with wonder. “It’s so big and shiny.” 

“Why do we have to go there?” 

“‘Cause I said so,” snapped Catra, wincing at her own tone. The anxiety in her stomach made her want to throw up or run away or anything but what she needed to do. “Do you think that you two can stay safe on your own? I can’t take you with me.” 

“Uh, duh, we’re like the best fighters ever,” replied little Catra, setting her fists on her hips. “And we have knives. Nobody ever gave us knives before.” 

Little Adora looked a bit more reluctant. “What if a bot finds us?” 

“They don’t come this far out. The only thing you two need to keep an eye out for is princesses and Rebellion soldiers.” 

“And we’ll stab ‘em and claw their faces off!” Little Adora cheered, nudging little Catra, who bounced up and down next to them. 

Catra let out a chuckle. “I like the enthusiasm, but no, no clawing anyone’s face off or stabbing.” Both girls groaned and rolled their eyes. “If a princess or a Rebellion solider finds you, tell them you need to talk to She-ra right away. Got it?”

“Yes, ma’am. No hurting the Rebellion and ask for She-ra.” Adora echoed back, but her face was scrunched up in distaste. 

Catra glanced around, looking for a hiding place. “Alright, you two are spending a night in a tree. Kitten, you’re in charge,” Little Catra whooped loudly, cutting Catra off. 

“What? But I’m….” Little Adora’s lower lip trembled slightly. 

“Look, what I was gonna say, is you’re in charge of making sure you two don’t fall out of the tree. Now, c’mon, I’ll help you guys up.” Catra passed her rucksack to little Adora, who looked incredibly thrilled by the responsibility. Only little Adora took her help while little Catra scrambled up the tree to help pull little Adora up. “Stay put until I come back. Only come down for me, okay?” 

“Can you do any birdcalls?” Little Adora yelled down. 

“Birdcalls?” 

“Or whistle? We need a signal. I read it in the Horde Manual.” 

Stars, she forgot what a dork Adora was. “Sure, I’ll whistle when I come back. Try and get some rest.” 

The two little girls called back their goodbyes as Catra slunk off into the tree line. There was a ridge that jutted out to the back of Bright Moon without many guards. That would have to be her best bet. If all went to plan, she’d be able to find Adora’s room without much difficulty and then convince Adora to help her, which would be infinitely more difficult. 

She stuck to the edge of the forest as she worked her way towards the back of the castle, eyes fixed on the troops training below her. One misstep and she’d be dead. So really she hadn’t improved her overall place in the world these days. Everyone wanted her dead and probably wouldn’t hesitate to kill her. As long as she got the girls to safety and then fixed from whatever weird magic this was, it would be fine. And anyway, execution at the hands of the Rebellion would be nicer than whatever Hordak’s twisted mind could come up with. 

As the world fell to complete darkness, Catra positioned herself in a tree that would allow her to watch the castle with ease. Luckily, Bright Moon lived up to its name and every room was brightly illuminated, so anyone could watch the inhabitants with ease. 

Resting her chin on her knees, she watched the rooms, waiting for Adora to appear. 

Maybe death wouldn’t be so bad. It couldn’t be the worst. Maybe then every minute of every day wouldn’t feel like something was clawing its way out of her chest, leaving the remains of her heart. 

A door to a balcony cracked open and Adora’s laugh echoed across the chasm. That was something that hadn’t changed over the years. 

Catra focused in on the room the sound came from. Adora was there along with the two idiots she had left Catra for. 

She had spent too many nights awake wondering what was so special about them. The answer Catra had finally landed on was it was that they were  _ special _ and Catra, as everyone had always told her, was not. 

She pushed down that pain, leaving the old wound to fester. 

And so she watched as Adora and her new friends laughed and chatted and stars, when did this start hurting again. 

After what felt like a lifetime, Adora and the boy left the room after a long good night with lots of hugs and kisses. 

Catra waited for Adora to reappear in a room. Once she had her target, Catra dropped out of the tree, shaking her aching limbs. 

She was going to have to jump it. If she missed, she’d probably shatter both of her legs. For Hordak’s sake, she needed to stop getting into these sorts of situations. With a running leap, she landed on a window sill a whole floor below Adora’s room. 

Not ideal in any way. Despite the screaming in her muscles, Catra pulled herself up, balancing precariously on the arch. 

“Huh, could’ve sworn I heard something.” A droll voice floated up. Catra pressed her body as flat to the wall as possible. A head and shoulders emerged from the window, but only looked right and left, not up. Catra exhaled shakily when whoever it was flicked off their light and fell silent. 

She scaled the way up to Adora’s balcony. Of course, she had a balcony, fancy princess and all. Once she was on the balcony, she moved around quickly to curl into the shadows against the wall formed by the window. 

The light was already off and Catra was just mustering up the courage to speak to Adora, a loud knock sounded inside the room. 

There was a shuffle of feet and then, “Uh, hey Adora, I just got a weird report from the forest. One of our scouting teams found a couple of Horde-issued ration bars and a Horde bot totally torn up.” 

“What? Do you think the Horde’s attacking?” Adora sounded more panicked than Catra was used to. 

“No, no, nothing like that. But the bot, it looked like it was torn up by claws.” 

“A lot of things in the Whispering Forest have claws, I guess.” 

“This seemed more deliberate. I’m not sure what could cause this kind of damage, but I’ll keep looking into it.” 

“Wait, Bow, what do you mean? Deliberate how?” 

“Most of the damage was in the ocular centre. It was torn out pretty cleanly. So I don’t think it was some animal.” 

“Hm, strange.” 

“Like I said, I’ll keep an eye out for any more weird reports. Sleep well, Adora.” 

“You too, Bow.” 

Footsteps came closer to the open door and then stopped. Catra held her breath. She could just barely hear Adora mumbling to herself about something, but then slowly she stopped. 

Catra waited until her joints began to ache. She strained to listen for the familiar sound of Adora’s even breathing. 

After a long while, Catra moved in front of the door, slipping in easily. For a kingdom at war, there was very little security around here. 

Adora lay curled on her side, facing the window. Moonlight illuminated her face, her blonde hair ethereal under the light. 

Now wasn’t the time for Catra’s fascination with Adora’s hair though. She inhaled shakily, trying to stop the trembling in her fingers. 

She approached the bed silently, waiting for Adora to move or open her eyes or something. In all the years she had known her, Adora had been a light sleeper. But as with everything, she’d gone soft. 

Catra crouched in front of Adora’s face, resting one hand on her shoulder. She shook gently, waiting for Adora’s eyes to open. 

Those blue eyes flew open. 

“Hey, Adora.” 


	3. mirror in the sky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the real question is: why wouldn't you give knives to seven-year-old?

“Hey, Adora.” The words hung in the still night air for a brief moment before Adora shot up, sword already in hand. In a show of brute force, she wrestled Catra to the floor, her sword coming to rest on Catra’s throat. 

“Catra,” hissed Adora, fury blazing in her eyes. “What are you doing here? Are you here to kill me?” 

Catra laughed, the movement of her throat dangerously close to Adora’s sword. “Where’d the fun in that be?” 

Adora practically snarled at her. “The fun? The fun?” Her voice kept rising in pitch and volume, making Catra wince. “You have been trying to kill me for a year. And now what, you show up in the middle of the night and you’re here to talk? Sorry, I don’t believe your lies.” 

“I am. I’m just here to talk, ‘Dora,” her voice cracked as Adora increased the pressure on her throat. “I’m serious, Adora. Something’s happened…” Catra trailed off. How was she supposed to explain this? For once in her life, she didn’t have much of a plan beyond sneak into Bright Moon and try not to get killed. Adora stared at her blankly, the only movement the rise and fall of her chest. “Um, for starters, Hordak wants me dead, which is fun. But that’s not important.” 

“That’s not important?” croaked Adora, her eyes finally softening. 

Catra swallowed back the emotion rising in her throat. “Not really, Adora. What’s more important, what I need your help with, is… well, you see, somehow seven-year-old me and you travelled forward in time.” 

The softness that had surfaced in Adora’s eyes disappeared as soon as it had appeared. “Will you ever stop lying, Catra?” She shifted her weight forward as her eyes narrowed. 

“‘m not lying.” 

Catra winced as the blade broke the skin. Adora’s face faltered at the sight of blood, her body relaxing back. Catra took the opportunity to slip out of her grasp. Adora was getting just a bit too sword-happy near her neck for her liking. She skidded across the room as she kicked Adora off of her. Catra held her hands up, standing slowly to her feet. It was hard to reconcile this Adora with the one she left in the tree. “I’m just here to talk. I need your help.” 

Adora levelled the sword at her. “This doesn’t look like talking, Catra.” 

“Look, some weird magic stuff is going on.” 

“Magic stuff,” Adora repeated dully, her sword held aloft. 

“Magic as in I just spent the past four days carrying our,” she gestured between them, “seven-year-old selves through the woods to come here. They just appeared in the Fright Zone and well, I’m not exactly popular there at the moment and you haven’t been either. I couldn’t just leave them there. I’m not you.” She spat out, relishing in the look of anguish on Adora’s face. “Adora, I wouldn’t come to-”

“Ahhhhhh!” Catra stumbled forward as a weight hit her in the small of the back, almost forcing her to her knees. Before she could regain her balance, Princess Glitter or whatever popped into her field of view, making a mad grab for her. 

Catra glanced over her shoulder but found the door covered by Rebellion guards. Adora had the window covered, years of training together coming in handy. 

“Surrender, Horde scum.” The princess held up her fists, magic pouring off of her. 

“Adora, you have to listen to me.” Catra shifted her focus past Sparkles to Adora, pleading with her. “There are two little kids out in the woods right now that need  _ our  _ help. They are literally alone in the world.” 

“We can help them without you, scum. You’re probably the reason they’re in danger!” Catra snarled at her, baring her fangs. The princess gestured to the guards behind her. Two grabbed her arms, forcing her to her knees.

“Adora. Please. You have to believe me. Adora, they were hiding from Shadow Weaver and they’re just scared, little kids. I’ll surrender to the Rebellion or whatever, but you’ll never be able to find them and they’re seven, they’ll die in the woods.”

Adora turned slightly away from Catra on her knees, her profile illuminated by the moonlight. “I’m sorry, Catra, you’ve lied too many times. I’m sure it’s just some trap.” 

“Take her away.” 

The guards began to haul Catra away, but she fought against them, kicking and twisting away from them. 

“Adora, Adora! The little you that’s out there in the woods, she still calls the little, well, me, she’s still calling her kitty! Adora, please, I promised them. The little you made me have a signal because she read it in the Horde Manuals.” 

“Catra, this is all just stuff from when we were kids. It doesn’t prove anything.” 

Unbidden, tears began to fall down Catra’s cheeks. How could Adora keep abandoning her? She never wanted Catra. She always chose someone, something else. “Adora, I promised them. I promised them I wouldn’t let anyone hurt them. And I can’t do that without your help. They need help. Isn’t that what you princesses are supposed to be about? Or do I just not matter to you?” Adora twisted on her heel to stare at her. “Punish me all you want. But, please, don’t punish those little girls. Please don’t make me break a promise to them,” Catra’s voice choked on a sob, “It’s too early for that.”

“Let her go.” Catra’s knees sagged, the guards the only thing keeping her from collapsing on the ground. For once, Adora was on her side. Those little girls would be protected and safe. 

“What, Adora, are you serious?” 

“Glimmer.” Adora’s tone left no room for argument. She waved off the other princess’s concerns, her focus wholly on Catra. “You’ll take us to where these kid versions of us are and then we will figure it out from there.” 

Catra shook the guards off of her, taking a half step towards Adora. “I’ll take you alone.” 

“What?” 

“That’s out of the question!” Both Adora and the other princess spoke at once, their faces the perfect image of disbelief. “Why do you want Adora alone? So you can capture her?” 

“No, Glitzy, it’s so no one gets stabbed by a seven-year-old,” Catra said with an eye roll. Honestly, these rebels were so thick. 

The princess’s mouth fell open in shock while Adora just narrowed her eyes at her. “You told them to stab us?” The princess asked. 

Catra let out a cackle, clutching at her sides. “It was Adora’s idea actually.” 

The princess spun around to Adora, accusations on the tip of her tongue. Adora held up one hand in defence. “The Horde was good at indoctrination.” Then Adora shifted her focus back to Catra. “Why do they have knives? We, uh, they, um, whatever. They’re too little for knives.” 

Catra couldn’t resist the opportunity to take a dig at Adora. It at least might even the playing field a bit. “I gave them our old ones. You left yours, ya know, when you abandoned me? And I’m not stupid, I wasn’t just going to leave seven-year-olds in the woods with no way to defend themselves.” Adora’s stern expression faltered for a moment; Catra took that as a win. “So, are we going or not?” 

“Adora, I can’t let you do this. At least, let me come with you. This is probably a trap.” 

Adora shook her head. “No, I don’t think it is. I’m She-ra, I’ll be fine. How far into the woods are they?” 

Catra shrugged one shoulder. “Near the edge. I dunno, I don’t like those woods.” 

“I doubt they like you very much considering what you did to them,” grumbled Princess Tinsel. 

“Yeah, well, I don’t like you very much, but here we are,” Catra shot back, rolling her eyes. “Adora, can we go? I don’t think we should be leaving children in the woods.” 

“So that’s where you draw the line, huh?” 

“Glimmer, enough!” Adora stepped in between the two as Catra’s claws came out. She stood carefully between the two, but her gaze remained on Catra. “We’ll go and then you’ll surrender?” 

“You’ll take care of the girls? You’ll help them?” 

“Of course, that’s what we do. That’s what  _ I  _ do. I help people.” 

Catra tore her eyes away from Adora’s earnest blue ones. Where was this self righteous Adora when Shadow Weaver stole her away for days at a time? Or when other cadets pulled her tail and ears? Or when instructors spat out names like ‘animal’ and ‘mongrel’ more frequently than her actual name? Apparently, Adora’s ‘help’ only applied to those who weren’t her. 

“Save the princess crap for someone who cares. Are we going or not?” Catra began moving towards the window, just assuming Adora would follow her. But Catra found herself wrenched back by the back of her shirt, Adora lifting her easily. “Adora, what the fuck?” 

“We’re not going out the window, dummy. There are doors here.” For the briefest moments, the Adora in front of her was  _ her  _ Adora. “Glimmer,” and she was gone. “If we’re not back in an hour, come find us.” 

“Half an hour.” 

“Small children, freezing, in the very dangerous woods?” Catra interjected, still dangling in Adora’s grasp. 

Adora ignored her. “Fine, half an hour. Maybe get your mother up? And tell her what’s going on?” 

“Of course. Be safe, Adora.” Princess Glow made to leave the room, but paused in the doorway, her gaze lingering on Adora. The way she looked at her twisted at Catra. But then those eyes moved to Catra and darkened with barely restrained fury. Now that, that she could deal with. She’d rather have to see Sparkles glaring at her than watch her moon over Adora. It made her skin crawl. 

“Thanks, Glimmer.” 

It was official. Catra was gonna spew. 

Without any warning, Adora dropped her on the floor. Catra threw her tail out for balance at the last second, hissing as she hit the floor. “Seriously?” 

Adora turned away silently. She moved around the room, slipping on a fresh set of clothes. 

When she stripped off her pyjama top, Catra couldn’t help but stare at the claw marks she had left. The skin was still puckered and angry, four brutal lines bisecting her back. A flicker of guilt licked at her insides, but Catra pushed it away. She had nothing to feel guilty about. 

And yet, seeing her claw marks layered on top of years of scars that Catra had tended to was heartwrenching. 

Any thoughts of guilt vanished when Adora turned back to her, pulling her hair into her traditional ponytail. The look Adora fixed her with overflowed with mistrust and something darker that Catra didn’t want to identify. 

“Ready, princess?” Catra drawled, covering any uneasiness with her usual teasing. 

“Sure, fine, let’s go.” Adora placed her dumb, big sword on her back. She stepped past Catra without another word, leading her through the strangely bright hallways. 

Everything was so bright and clean and it made Catra’s skin crawl. 

As they walked through the castle, Catra caught herself cataloguing every strategic detail of the building, counting the number of hallways and each of the admittedly limited guards. It was so vastly different from the Fright Zone. There was just a softness to the whole place. 

And anyway, it wouldn’t matter, she decided. 

Somewhere between Adora’s room and the exit, Catra formed a plan. It wasn’t ideal. But it was the best she could do for now. 

She’d lead Adora to the girls, make sure they were safe and then fade into the forest. It would be better that way. Adora didn’t need her around. She and the magic, super friends could help the girls and fix everything. Catra just made everything worse. Catra would disappear into the forest and, who knows, go to the Crimson Wastes or something. She’d just become the animal in the forest Shadow Weaver had always threatened she was. 

The cool night air was a relief from the overly perfumed hallways of Bright Moon. Her shoulders dropped further down as her muscles relaxed. Eyes lingered on the back of her head, making her fur stand on end, but Catra was used to people watching her suspiciously. 

“What way?” 

Catra scanned the treeline, searching for the overlarge tree. She pointed up towards it. “Right there.” Adora grunted in agreement as she stomped off in that direction. “Geez, you’re in a great mood as always, Adora.” 

“Yeah, well,  _ somebody _ woke me up in the middle of the night to go traipsing through the woods. You’re lucky I’m willing to give you a chance, Catra. You’re not exactly trustworthy.” 

“Hm, I suppose it might have gone better if I begged on my knees for you?” 

“Isn’t that what you did?” Adora said with a sneer. 

Catra nearly stumbled over her own feet at the abject hostility in Adora’s tone. This was new. “Whatever, Adora.” 

“And anyway, what were you thinking leaving two little kids out in the woods by themselves? Of all the dumb things to do! They could be dead!” 

“They’re us, they’ll be fine.” 

Adora opened her mouth, then snapped it shut, keeping her gaze forward. 

They crossed the last bit of open land in silence. Normally, Catra enjoyed the silence. This silence though felt almost poisonous in the air. 

Catra came to a halt in front of the tree, ignoring the way Adora walked into her, nearly sending her to the ground. She could hear the light giggling and whisperings that she had become accustomed to over the past few days floating down. 

“This one?” Adora asked, brandishing one hand. 

“Yep.” Catra tilted her head up, just barely making out a dangling shoe. She whistled lightly, hoping it was loud enough for the girls to hear. 

“Catra!” The branches rustled above her head, leaves falling into her hair. Without much further warning, little Catra dropped onto her head, her claws digging into Catra’s shoulders. “You came back!” 

“Hey, kitten, I promised, didn’t I? Where’s Adora?” 

“‘m stuck! Help me, Catra!” 

Catra rolled her eyes. Tugging little Catra off her shoulders, she shoved the girl into Adora’s unsuspecting arms. “I’m comin’ up, kid.” She climbed up into the tree with ease, finding little Adora staring at the ground with wide eyes, the rucksack clutched in her arms. “Hey, Adora, c’mere and I’ll get you down. There’s someone I’m sure you’ll wanna meet.” 

The little girl nodded warily as she inched along the branches until Catra could wrap an arm around her waist. 

“Ready?” 

“Uh-huh.” 

Catra dropped out of the tree, landing on her feet, Adora still propped on her hip. 

She spun around to find little Catra poking incessantly at Adora’s face. And the great princess herself looked rather uncomfortable with the child in her arms. 

“Look, ‘Dora, she’s you. Even still has a dumb tail.” Little Catra reached an arm around and pulled hard on Adora’s ponytail. Catra winced in sympathy; both girls had tugged on her hair and ears too many times to count in the past few days. 

“Whoa,” gasped little Adora, her mouth falling open as she took in her younger self. “This is so cool.” Catra set the girl down, letting her move closer to Adora, who honestly looked like someone sucker-punched her. 

Her gaze flitted between the two little girls and Catra, who had taken up a spot leaning against the tree. “You weren’t lying.” 

“Sorry to disappoint.” 

“That’s not what I- ugh, whatever, you’re impossible.” 

Little Catra lept out of Adora’s arm, scraping her along the way, to stand next to Adora. Adora dropped to a knee in front of them, her eyes shining. 

“You guys are seven?” Both girls nodded. “And you’re safe? Catra didn’t hurt you guys or anything?” 

Catra swallowed back the lump in her throat at Adora’s question. How could she think Catra would hurt two defenceless children? Did she truly think her a monster. 

“‘Course not, Catra’d never hurt me,” said little Adora, wrapping one arm around little Catra’s shoulders. 

“Yeah, she saved us from ‘tavia and I got to fire a tank! It was awesome!” 

“You fired a tank?” Adora asked, lifting her gaze to Catra. “You let a seven-year-old fire a tank? What is wrong with you?” Adora lept to her feet. One hand twitched like it wanted to go for her sword. 

Catra held up her hands, leaning further back into the tree. “I didn’t let her, she just did it.” 

“Yeah, I saved her from ‘tavia and all the rest,” piped up little Catra, her hands on her hips. 

Adora took another step closer to Catra, ignoring the little girls. 

“Of all the irresponsible-” 

“Adora, I didn’t-” 

“Why are you two yelling at each other?” Little Adora all but yelled, stamping her foot. She held little Catra close with one arm while the other gestured wildly between the older pair. “You’re supposed to be best friends!” 

Catra couldn’t stop the noise of disgust that fell from her lips. “Yeah, well, things change.” 

Adora looked away, her cheeks blazing. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to yell.” She dropped down to one knee again. “I should introduce myself first.” She offered a hand out to her younger self. 

“I know who you are. You’re me,” said little Adora, staring at Adora’s hand like it was an alien. 

Adora laughed and Catra’s heart crumbled. “Yeah, I guess I am.” 

As the two Adoras talked, Catra realized that this would probably be her only opportunity to get away before Adora had her arrested. 

She shuffled around the base of the tree until she was just out of sight of the others. Exhaling sharply, she started to slink back into the shadows of the woods when a small hand caught hers. 

“Where’re you goin’, Catra?” Her little self asked, squeezing her fingers. Catra squeezed her eyes shut against the tears suddenly threatening to spill. “You promised. You promised to keep me safe.” 

“Kitten, it’s…” Words failed her. 

The little hand dropped hers and Catra still could bring herself to turn around. “It’s okay. I get it. I wouldn’t want to stick ‘round for me anyway. Nobody wants me.” 

Catra spun on her heel, falling to her knees in front of her younger self. She cupped the little girl’s face, forcing her to look up from the ground. “Kitten, no, that’s not it.” 

“So you’re not leaving me?” 

Fleeting thoughts of freedom echoed in her mind for a moment. If she went back to the castle, it could only end poorly. “Nah, kitten, I said I’d keep you safe. And hey, don’t let Shadow Weaver and the rest get in your head. You’re not alone. People care about you.” The lie fell all too easily from her lips and it made her sick. But the look of hope in her younger self’s eyes almost made it worth it. 

“Catra, are you ready to go?” Adora appeared from behind the tree, her little self close at her knee. 

“Um, yeah, totally ready.” Catra stood to her feet, offering a hand to little Catra, who bypassed it in favor of climbing up to Catra’s back. “Let’s get going.” 

They started to make their way back towards Bright Moon when little Adora pulled Adora to a stop. Catra hesitated near them, the weight of little Catra increasingly uncomfortable. The little girl nuzzled her face into Catra’s neck, exhaling slow, warm breaths of air. 

“Can you carry me?” 

“Uh,” Adora mumbled, glancing back to Catra, “sure, hop on.” It took them a minute to get adjusted before they could start walking again. 

The pair of them had maybe taken ten steps before snoring could be heard. 

Adora grinned at the sound. “You’re asleep.” 

“Yeah, well, so are you.” Catra nodded to the dozing blonde hanging off Adora’s back. “So, uh, what’s the plan?” 

“First, we’ll need to figure out how they got here. I’m sure the Queen will know what to do. And then I guess send them back?” 

“I kinda figured that part out already. I meant more, like what about me?” 

“Oh.” Adora fell silent for a long time before speaking again, “You’ve done a lot of damage, Catra. I don’t know if they can just like forgive that.” 

To Catra’s ears, that was as close to a confirmation of execution as she thought she’d get out of Adora. At least it’d be quick. 

(And, that dangerous part of her mind said, she’d have seen Adora one last time.) 

As soon as they got within shouting distance of the castle, Princess Sparkles appeared by their side. 

“Oh, thank the-” 

“Shut up,” Catra hissed before the princess could all but scream at them. The affronted look on her face was just a fun bonus. “Small children are sleeping here.” 

“Oh,” the princess took a peek at the two little girls on their backs, her mouth falling open like a fish. “Wow, it’s really you two.” She shook her head. “Right, well, we don’t have any spare rooms at the moment. You know, with our guest,” she inclined her head knowingly towards Adora, who’s lips dipped into a frown. “But if it’s alright, they can stay with you in your room?” 

“Uh, yeah, sure, the more the merrier.” 

Glitter led them back through the castle, quietly speaking with Adora as they went. Catra stayed a few steps back, her body overly tired from the added weight. 

Once they reached Adora’s room, all three older girls paused in front of the bed. 

“Um, I can see about getting another bed in here,” offered the princess. 

Adora waved her off, moving to set little Adora in the bed. “It’s fine, I’ll just sleep on the floor.” 

“Sleep on the floor? You can come share my bed if you want?” 

Catra failed to stop the cold laugh that bubbled up in her chest. “Bet you’d love that,” she mumbled. 

Little Adora reached her arms out, eyes still closed, searching for little Catra. “Kitty, c’mere.” Catra moved past Adora to gently place little Catra next to the blonde. Little Adora pulled little Catra the rest of the way in until their heads were stacked atop one another. 

Little Catra opened one eye, searching for her older self. “Where’re you going?” 

“Don’t worry about it, just sleep, kitten.” Catra ran her hand through the girl’s hair, once, twice, before turning away. 

“It’s sleepin’ time now, kitty.” 

Catra and Adora both flinched at the nickname as they moved away from the bed. Catra couldn’t bring herself to look at Adora, even out in the hallway. 

Once the door was shut, Catra’s body sagged against one of the walls, exhaustion overwhelming her. 

She let her eyes drift closed for a moment. She had done it. They were safe. 

“Aw, you were so cute, kitty, all curled up-” Before the princess could finish her sentence, Catra lunged at her, claws at her throat. 

“Call me that again and I will tear your throat out.” 

“Catra, no!” Adora grabbed her shoulder, pulling her off the princess. The princess looked nothing short of terrified, much to Catra’s pleasure. 

“Guards!” Glitzy called, “take the prisoner away. My mother will want to speak with her tomorrow morning.” 

“Glimmer, do we have to, ya know, do this?” 

But Adora’s momentary protestations were ignored as two guards tugged Catra away from her, shoving her forward. The guards pushed her further down the hallway when Catra glanced back at Adora arguing quietly with the princess. “Hey, Adora?” Adora’s head snapped up. “Keep them safe, please.” The blonde nodded quickly. “Promise?” She asked, fighting back the tears that she had suppressed for so long. 

“Yeah, Catra, I promise.” Her voice floated softly down the hall before Catra’s guards pushed her around a corner and towards another guard stationed in front of a room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the actual real question is will catra ever refer to glimmer as her proper name? 
> 
> this was originally gonna be longer with the next day, but it honestly was just too much, so I've split it up. so now there will be probably 6 chapters bc I'm an overachiever 
> 
> the whole kitty thing will be explored more and I promise there will be more characters with each chapter 
> 
> I've loved reading all your comments and have been doing my best to respond to all of them! keep 'em coming! 
> 
> say hi on Tumblr at avasharpest ! 
> 
> much love


	4. like a heartbeat drives you mad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> catra, arguably, has a bad time. adora is just over it all. and the most important question: will catra ever get glimmer's name right? (no, probably not)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter title from "dreams" by fleetwood mac 
> 
> note: the pov does switch a few time early on, but it's relatively clear I think (if not lmk and I can reformat slightly)

Catra woke slowly, the sound of Adora’s familiar heartbeat grounding her. She pressed her nose into Adora’s shoulder, savouring the rare moment where she was awake before Adora. 

But as she came to greater awareness, terror gripped her heart. 

If Shadow Weaver found them, well, it’d be Catra’s head. 

She said they were too big to share a bed. That Catra was only dragging Adora down. That Catra was weak. 

Shadow Weaver’s voice echoed painfully in her head, the words ricocheting against her skull. 

Rolling out of Adora’s arms, she wrapped her arms over her ears.  _ “Oh, Catra, you know that won’t stop it. You need to learn.” _

A whimper fell from her lips. Then her eyes flew open. 

They were in the weird building with big Adora and herself. 

They weren’t in the Fright Zone. The walls weren’t lit by eerie lights. The pipes didn’t bang. She couldn’t hear the older cadets running their morning routes. 

Shadow Weaver couldn’t get her here. She was safe. Big Catra promised. 

Catra sat up slowly, rubbing at her eyes. Her Adora was still dead asleep, curled around the blanket Catra had left. She searched around the room for her older self, but she only found the older Adora, twisting in a blanket on the floor. 

“Catra?” she mumbled, sleep still affecting her voice. But her older self wasn’t here. Panic swelled within Catra’s chest like ice gripping at her. She promised. She promised. 

In, out, in, out, in, out. She counted her breaths slowly. Adora did this for her whenever she had nightmares. In, out, in, out, in, out. She just had to breathe. 

Maybe her older self was just awake already. Maybe she was just having her morning ration. That had to be it. Catra never skipped breakfast if she could help it. 

Stepping carefully over old Adora, and dodging a dangerous-looking punch, Catra snuck out of the room. The hallway gleamed in the morning light, making her eyes hurt. But there wasn’t anyone there. The quietness made Catra’s ears twitch. 

After a few long minutes wandering around, Catra found a single guard standing before a room. 

Curiosity overtook her desire to find her older self. Tucked behind a corner, Catra watched the woman. If these guards were anything like the ones at the Fright Zone, there’d be a point where they got bored or distracted and Catra could sneak in. 

She had almost given up when a cheerful voice echoed down the hallway. “Morning, Chella!” 

“Oh hey, Bow, can I help you? Do you need to speak to the prisoner?” 

“Nah, I was just on my morning stroll and thought I’d ask if you need a coffee or anything.” 

Catra peaked around the corner and found the guard had moved down the hall to talk to a tall boy. As the guard was sufficiently distracted, Catra took off as fast as she could towards the door, pushing it open quietly. 

But as soon as she did, she wished she hadn’t. 

Shadow Weaver stared back at her, those eyes fixed on her. Catra could’ve sworn she was smiling under that dumb mask. 

Catra’s breath froze in her chest as she noticed the other figure in the room. “No!” She yelled, starting towards Shadow Weaver, but a strong arm caught her around the waist. “Let me go! No! Put me down!” She hissed and spit, scratching at the arm, but they wouldn’t let go. “Stop it!” 

“Okay, okay, I’ll put you down in a minute, but you’re definitely not allowed in there.” It was the boy from before. 

“No, no, I have to help-” 

The boy dropped her abruptly after one of her claws scratched down the length of his arm. “Yikes, your claws are really sharp! Look, Catra, right?” She nodded warily, her tail whipping nervously behind her. “How about we get you some breakfast? I’m sure you’re hungry.” 

“But I have to-” 

The boy cut her off, grabbing her shoulders as he spoke, “I bet you’ve never had pancakes before. You’re gonna love them.”

xx 

_ eight hours earlier…  _

Catra squirmed as the two guards pushed her further away from where Adora and the girls were. This was for the best. They’d do whatever to her and the girls would be safe. And Adora, Adora would be free of her finally. 

Once they stopped, another guard produced two sets of cuffs as they stood in front of a door that Catra could only assume led to the cells. 

That old, familiar terror of being locked in the cells surfaced, her breathing growing increasingly faint. She dug her claws into the palm of her hand, the sharp pain grounding her. 

“Hands,” the guard grunted at her. She offered her hands up, momentarily weighing the possibility of escape. But that had never ended well for her in the past. “Joe, you get her paws? Feet? Whatever, just put these on her.” Catra’s ears flattened at the casual slur. Turns out the princesses weren’t any better than the Horde when it came to prejudice. “You’ll be sharing with another prisoner in the cell.” 

“D’you mean the spare room?” One of the guards behind Catra asked. 

Catra let out a low chuckle. “Wow, it’s a wonder you guys aren’t winning.”

“Shut up, Matty.” The first guard tightened the cuffs around her wrists. “And you, you better watch your tongue.” 

“Yeah, yeah, you’re very threatening. Can we get on with this? I’m pretty tired, ya know, from kicking all of your asses for the past year?” 

The guard’s mouth curled into a snarl, leaning in until his face was inches away from Catra’s. “And now you’re our prisoner. Put her in the spar-, I mean, put her in the cell.” 

“Ooh, scary. The spare room, I’m sure it’s very intimidating. I’ve been putting up with this bullshit for...” Catra trailed off as she came face to face with, “Shadow Weaver.” Every nerve in her body went into high alert. Panic surged through her already exhausted body. She took half a step back, but the guards were there pushing her forward. 

“Get in there. We’ll come get you when the queen is ready to pass your sentence.” Catra couldn’t move. Every muscle in her body screamed. How…? Why…? “Huh, no clever comments now. Well, sleep well, kitty cat.” 

The guard pushed her forward until she fell to the ground. The door slammed shut behind her. Catra flinched. 

“Hello, Catra dear,” Shadow Weaver all but purred. 

“What are you doing here?” She pressed herself against the wall, inching as far away the witch as possible. “How are you here?” 

“Why, I came for Adora.” 

The words hit Catra like a physical blow. She was here for  _ Adora _ . It was always Adora. Catra risked everything to help Shadow Weaver, to save her from Hordak and she still chooses Adora. It was always Adora. Adora caused everything. 

“No!” Catra hissed, pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes in an attempt to stem the tears that threatened to spill. “No, why her? Why do you always choose her?” 

Shadow Weaver floated forward towards the barrier, looming over Catra. “Because Catra, Adora is worth something.” 

“I saved you! I got you your stupid medal thing and you just left me!” 

Shadow Weaver cackled, the sound pulling at the threads of Catra’s mind. “Haven’t you learned yet, Catra? Nobody wants you. Not me. Not your parents who left you out like garbage. And certainly not Adora. She doesn’t need you around. She doesn’t want you around. She has real friends with real power now. You are nothing, Catra.” 

Catra drew her knees to her chest, tears spilling down her cheeks. The cuffs cut into her arms and legs painfully and the pain was all that kept her tethered to earth. “Stop it.” 

“Aw, kitty cat, I thought I taught you not to cry. I suppose animals like you never learn, do they?” 

Shadow Weaver’s voice surrounded her. Catra tried to bury her head in her arms, but the cuffs made it difficult to manoeuvre. “No, no, I won. I beat you.” 

“Then why are you here, kitty?” Catra tried to cling to the memory of little Adora holding little Catra, the memory of Adora’s laugh. But the only thing was the sound and feeling of Shadow Weaver’s voice. “You failed. You’re nothing more than a failure, Catra. And now you’ve come to drag Adora down with you.” 

“No!” 

“Yes, child. As always, you will be Adora’s ruin.” 

She was never good enough. She was never enough. She was nothing.

xx 

Catra glanced up when she heard the door open, her eyes tired and blurry. Bright light poured in from the hallway and there was some movement, but Catra was too tired to focus on it. The door shut as quickly as it had opened. 

She buried her face back in her knees, Shadow Weaver’s presence alone enough to send her into a tailspin of emotion. 

How many nights had she spent either alone in a cell or under Shadow Weaver’s watchful eye? All while Adora slept peacefully in the dorm, safe from Shadow Weaver’s magic. Every mistake was punished. 

But Catra had been the one who rose to the top of the Horde. She had risen above everything and everyone. Adora just ran away and left Catra. Adora knew what would happen if she left Catra. She knew what Shadow Weaver would do. 

_ “You are nothing.”  _

_ “Nobody wants you.”  _

_ “I came for Adora.”  _

“You know, Catra,” Shadow Weaver’s tone oozed false affection. 

Catra propped her chin on her knees, fixing Shadow Weaver with the strongest glare she could muster. “Oh, are we on to your monologing now? I suppose that’s all you can do without your magic.” 

“I have no magic and yet you still fear me.” 

“I am not afraid of you.” 

“You cower like a wounded animal in the shadows.” 

“I am not afraid of you, you old witch!” Catra snarled, but even to her own ears it sounded weak. “You can’t hurt me anymore!” 

Shadow Weaver’s laugh echoed in the small room and it was like every nightmare Catra had come to life. 

At least here, there would eventually be an end. That alone differentiated this from the past times she had been locked alone with Shadow Weaver. All those times where Shadow Weaver threatened to keep her locked away forever. To tell Adora she died or that she had been sent to Beast Island. 

Sometimes, when the pain got too much, Catra would beg for Shadow Weaver to just send her away. She would promise that she would never come back, that she would stay away from Adora. But the smallest part of her that she kept hidden from Shadow Weaver’s invasive techniques hoped and prayed that if she was sent away, Adora would come find her. Shadow Weaver had known that too though and the last thing she wanted was to lose control of Adora, so Catra was stuck. 

Funny wasn’t it? Catra would have given up everything to be away from the Horde, so long as Adora would come with her, come find her. But Adora had given Catra up to escape. 

Phantom tremors from the ‘session’ she had with Shadow Weaver following Adora’s disappearance racked her body. 

“I don’t need magic to control you, child. You will always be mine to use, don’t you see that? And as long as I have you, Adora is easy. She never could manage to understand what you meant to her. But you know what she means to you, don’t you, Catra?” 

“I hate her!” Catra snapped. The words as always though felt achingly hollow, like how her stomach felt after one too many days without a ration. 

Only years of carefully watching Shadow Weaver’s expressions could have prepared her for the approximation of a smile crossing her features. 

“Oh, that’s not it at all, my dear kitty. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that a dumb creature like you would overlook it. Or is it just that you can’t bear that your precious Adora doesn’t want you anymore?” Shadow Weaver floated nearer to Catra, practically pressing against the magical barrier. 

Catra curled further back into the wall, desperate to escape. “Stop it,” her voice barely managed above a whimper. 

“You know, kitty, I see everything. I see how Adora doesn’t look at you how she used to. I see how she fawns over those princesses. One in particular, it’s almost as if-“

“Enough! Stop it!” Catra slammed her hands on the ground, her voice cracking. 

Shadow Weaver clicked her tongue. “Now, now, Catra, what have I said about raising your voice at me? It never ends well for you, does it? These little acts of rebellion.” Hot tears tracked down her face as her vision blurred. Shadow Weaver seemed to grow in size before her eyes, looming over her like she had for so many years. “Tell me, Catra, do you think Adora will cry when you die? Will you let her down one last time? Break one more promise?” 

“I didn’t break our promise! She did!”

xx 

Catra watched, her tail whipping anxiously behind her, as the tall boy moved around the room, apparently getting food for her. It all seemed like a lot of work for a ration bar. 

She needed to get Adora, big Adora that is, not her Adora. Big Catra had promised to keep her safe and she had kept that promise. But Catra needed to help her older self out too. 

She thought that big Catra had risked everything to rescue them from Shadow Weaver and she saved them. But now she was locked in a room with Shadow Weaver. How could Adora let that happen? 

_ Because Adora always let it happen.  _ A voice that sounded a bit too much like Shadow Weaver’s whispered in her mind. Catra shook her head violently. Adora hated that Shadow Weaver was so mean to her. She tried to protect Catra. 

The image of her older self curled against a wall burned before her eyes. The boy kept chatting away to himself. 

Finally, he turned his back to Catra, bending down to retrieve something and Catra took her opportunity. It was an important skill in her opinion to escape from boring adults. 

Catra darted towards the door, realising as she made it to the corridor that she had no idea where Adora was. Blindly, she took off down the more familiar looking direction. Her claws clicked on the shiny floors and there wasn’t anywhere for her to climb. 

“Catra! Come back, Catra! I was making you my world-famous pancakes!” The boy was already chasing her. 

Catra sped up. She was the fastest in their class and could even outrun the mean older kids who played a game called ‘Catch the Cat’ where they tried to pull her tail. She wasn’t going to get caught by some boy who left all his important bits uncovered where someone could stab him. (Not that Catra was going to stab him or anything)

As footsteps approached, Catra veered to the left, hoping it was the right way. She collided with someone much taller than her. Letting off a hiss, she scrambled to her feet, taking off at a full sprint before they caught her. 

“Are you okay, Spinny?” A voice echoed up the corridor. 

“It looked like a little kid. Are there little kids here now?” 

“No clue. Nobody tells us anything these days.” 

A familiar looking door appeared before Catra. Just as she went to open it, it flew open and big Adora was staring down at her. 

“Kitty!” Her Adora launched herself across the room into her arms, tugging a bit at her hair. “I was so worried! Where’d you go? Wha’ happened?” Catra tightened her arms around Adora, inhaling her familiar scent. Seeing Shadow Weaver like that, in a place they were supposed to be safe was too scary. 

“Er, little Catra, uh, Catra, you can’t go wandering off on your own here. It’s dangerous.” 

Catra’s face twisted into a sneer. She pried herself out of Adora’s grip, moving to stand in front of big Adora. “I need your help!”

“Help? With what?” Big Adora dropped to a knee. “What’s wrong? Are you hungry? Do you need a bath? I don’t know what kids need. Was I even a kid?” 

Catra grabbed big Adora’s cheeks, forcing her to stop talking. “We need to plan a rescue mission.” 

“For who?” Adora asked, her words garbled by the way Catra was holding her cheeks. 

“A rescue mission?” Her Adora piped up, hovering over Catra’s shoulder. 

“For your me.” 

“Huh?” 

“For your Catra!” Her Adora added helpfully. “Wait, why does she need rescuing?” 

Catra finally let go of big Adora’s cheeks, turning to face her Adora. 

Big Adora rubbed her cheeks slightly, mumbling something about, “She’s not  _ mine _ .” But Catra had more important things. 

”She’s trapped in a room with Shadow Weaver!” Catra yelped, her own fear of Shadow Weaver surfacing. Blindly, she reached for Adora’s hand, desperate for her calming touch. “Shadow Weaver’s going to hurt her! We have to do something!” 

All colour had drained out of big Adora’s face. Her mouth fell open but no words came out. Don’t most people get smarter the older they get? Was big Adora dumb? Which would kind of make sense, but that was not helpful now. 

Her Adora’s grip tightened almost painfully. 

“She’s with Shadow Weaver?” 

“That’s what I just said, dummy! How could you let Shadow Weaver take her?” 

“I-I-I didn’t… Glimmer….” 

“Adora!” A new person appeared in the room, glitter falling off of her. Both the children yelped, clutching at each other. 

“Is that...is that a princess?” Her Adora asked, positioning herself slightly in front of Catra. “Stay back!” 

“Stand down, Adora,” big Adora snapped, “She’s a friend. Or so I thought.” A dark expression crossed her face unlike anything Catra had seen on her Adora. “Glimmer. Tell me you didn’t.” 

“Adora, that one.” the princess gestured at Catra, “has been running around the castle. She nearly knocked over Spinnerella! And she broke into-“ 

“The spare room where Shadow Weaver is being held?” 

“Yes,” the princess took a step further towards Catra and Adora. Catra let out a low hiss. “Did she just hiss at me?” 

“Her name is Catra!” Catra’s Adora said, her voice unwavering, unlike her older counterpart. “Stay away from us, princess!” 

Big Adora took a few slow breaths before she spoke, “Glimmer, please, tell me that you didn’t put Catra in the spare room with  _ her _ .” 

“Well, Adora, we only have the one spare room, er, cell.” 

A chill rose up Catra’s spine. Why was her older self being held in a cell? Why was big Adora apparently friends with a princess? Why didn’t big Adora know where her Catra was? They said they weren’t best friends anymore. What happened to them? Adora wasn’t with the Horde. That wasn’t right. 

“Glimmer-“ 

“Look, they were on the same side at one point. And she raised you two. So what harm does a little family reunion do?” 

Colour rose high in big Adora’s cheeks. “A little family reunion? Glimmer, I swear to She-ra-“ Big Adora cut herself off mid-sentence, “No, you know what, I’m not doing this in front of them. I’m going to go get Catra. We will talk about this later.” 

“What? Are you just going to leave me with these two?” 

Catra nearly recoiled from the look of disgust in big Adora’s eyes. “No, I’m not stupid. I’ll take them to Spinnerella and Netossa. I trust them to take care of them.” Big Adora motioned roughly for the girls to follow. “I have a promise to keep.”

xx 

Vaguely, Catra was aware that Shadow Weaver was still speaking to her. But she couldn’t hear what she was saying over the flood of tears and loud thoughts in her own mind. 

_ Not good enough.  _

_ Nobody wants you.  _

_ Everyone leaves you.  _

_ You’re a coward.  _

_ A disgrace. _

_ A waste of space.  _

_ A waste of life.  _

_ Do you think Adora will cry when you die? _

Another sob wracked her body. She was so weak. Shadow Weaver was right. She didn’t need magic to hurt Catra. Catra was weak. She was nothing. 

“Catra!” Adora’s voice was a faint memory. She always used to hold on to memories of Adora during Shadow Weaver’s sessions, the feel of her calloused palms, the smell of her hair, the sound of her voice calling her name. But ever since Adora left those happy memories slipped away like water through her claws. 

“Catra!” 

Was her own mind mocking her? 

“Adora,” hissed Shadow Weaver. 

“Shut up!” 

A pair of strong arms wrapped around Catra. Catra blinked her sore eyes open, catching on the blonde so near to her face. 

“‘Dora?” 

“I’ve got you, Catra. I promised. I promised.” 

Catra curled into Adora, feeling altogether too raw in that moment. But all too soon, Catra registered where she was. Even as tears fell down her cheeks, she twisted out of Adora’s arms, falling awkwardly to the floor due to the chains around her wrists and ankles. “Don’t touch me!” She scrambled away from Adora, leaning against the wall outside the cell. She could still hear Shadow Weaver’s voice calling for Adora before someone slammed the door shut. 

“I’m sorry,” whispered Adora, crouching down in front of her. 

Catra let out a low hiss, daring Adora to come near to her. This was probably part of their plan. Break Catra down and then send Adora in to ‘save the day’ so Catra would be in her debt. “It was fine.” 

“You’re crying.” 

Catra barked out a harsh laugh. “You don’t say, Adora. Gee, you really are the brains of the operation around here aren’t you?” 

“Catra, c’mon, nobody should have to deal with Shadow Weaver like that.” 

“Oh, now you care? Unlike the past twenty or so years?” Catra inhaled a shaky breath, pressing her shoulder blades against the wall for support. “You didn’t care, you never did.” 

“Catra-“ 

“You didn’t care that everything, everything I did, even the most minor infractions meant an evening with Shadow Weaver. You didn’t care that any mistakes you made meant a few days locked in the cells. You didn’t care that she threatened to kill me so many times that I don’t actually care anymore. You didn’t-“ 

“I did- I do! Catra, you have to believe me. Why do you think I tried so hard to be perfect? I didn’t want to give Shadow Weaver any more excuses to hurt you, to blame you. I tried to-“

“Enough!” Catra hissed, “I don’t want your excuses. What’s done is done. Just leave me alone, Adora.” She turned away, unable to look at Adora’s big, dumb, sad eyes. She never had been very good at staying mad at Adora. 

“Oh hey, guys, so funny story, everybody in the whole castle can hear you.” That dumb boy who tagged along with Adora interjected. “And the Queen would like to speak to you.” He grabbed the back of his neck as his eyes darted between Catra sprawled on the floor and Adora, near tears. “Also, she and Glimmer wanted me to make sure that you weren’t letting the prisoner go.” 

“Feel free, Adora. I promise I won’t tell,” Catra teased in a bad approximation of her normal teasing manner. She felt too drained for that level of wit anymore. In one smooth motion, Catra jumped to her feet, just managing to keep her balance even with the manacles around her ankles. “Right, let’s go find out how I’m going to die.” 

“Catra, wait, what?” 

“Catra!” Before Catra could brace herself, two small bodies were flying through the air. Catra stumbled back, prepared to hit the ground, but Adora caught her around the shoulders. “You’re okay.” Little Catra hummed against her cheek, nuzzling slightly. “I said we had to save you.” 

Swallowing back the lump in her throat, Catra managed, “Thanks, kitten. I owe you one.” 

“Nah, you promised to keep me safe, so I’ll keep you safe. Same promise with Adora. My Adora, I mean. I don’t like yours.” Catra let out a wet laugh. “What? It’s true.” 

“She’s right,” Little Adora added from somewhere around Catra’s waist. 

Adora looked mildly affronted but remained silent. 

Two older women appeared at the end of the hallway. “Stars, Adora, you were an unholy terror,” the one with purple hair said as she hunched over in an effort to catch her breath. “One minute we were getting them breakfast and you, little you, that is asked for something to drink and then they were gone.” 

“We wanted to make sure you were safe,” Little Catra whispered, “and I think they’re princesses, which is kinda scary.” 

Catra chuckled against little Catra’s hair, cradling her as best she could with her arms. 

“Adora,” the boy cut in, his tone sharp, “the Queen, we shouldn’t keep her waiting.” 

“I know, Bow. Can you guys take the little ones?” Adora motioned to the two little girls clinging to Catra. The girls curled ever closer to Catra, their faces apprehensive. 

“Come along then,” the silver-haired woman waved an arm. Catra was fairly certain she was the one with the nets, which again, kind of lame. 

Catra winced as little Catra’s claws extended into the back of her neck. “I don’t wanna. You’re crying,” Little Catra whispered, her grip tightening. 

“Happens sometimes.” 

“Did Shadow Weaver, ya know, do the magic thing?” 

“She doesn’t have magic anymore. At least I don’t think she does. She just said some bad things. It’s nothing I haven’t heard before.” Little Catra shivered in her arms. “It doesn’t matter.” Little Catra’s claws scratched at the back of her neck, just on the edge of breaking the skin. “She can’t touch you. She can’t touch you,” she repeated. It was for little Catra’s benefit. That was it. That was definitely it. 

Even as the sharp pinpricks of pain grounded her, her mind kept slipping to Shadow Weaver. Why was she here? Beyond the obvious of her incessant need to be with Adora, Catra couldn’t help but think that there was something more. Shadow Weaver was always four steps ahead of everyone else. Catra tended to be two, but Shadow Weaver could even out maneuver her. She always knew everything. The logical part of Catra could recognize that it was due to her magic, but the rest of her was wary that Shadow Weaver just  _ knew  _ things. How many times had she been caught out and punished by the witch? How many times had Shadow Weaver appeared at the last moment, sweeping in to put an end to whatever plot or bit of fun she and Adora had come up with. 

“Catra, the girls, they should go.” Adora’s voice broke her from her trance. “They shouldn’t have to see-” 

Catra cut her off, “Okay, you two need to go with those adults. Aren’t you guys starving? I bet they have something better than a ration bar?” As if on cue, little Adora’s stomach growled. Catra forced a laugh as the little girl’s cheeks flushed. “See, why don’t you go with them?” She lifted her gaze to the two princesses, who were looking at her with pity? That made her fur stand on end. They shouldn’t pity her. They should fear her. Not pity, never pity.

The taller one extended a hand cautiously to little Adora. “Why don’t we go down to the kitchens for a little while? I think I saw some cupcakes and chocolate,” 

“Great idea, Spinny, just give the babies sugar,” groused her partner with a pout. 

“What’s chocolate?” Little Adora asked from her spot at Catra’s waist. “Sounds weird.” 

“It’s the best, you’ll love it,” her older self supplied with that dumb grin of hers. “Like blow your mind good.” 

Little Adora tilted her chin thoughtfully before nodding and accepting the woman’s hand. Adora’s stomach had always been a weak spot, Catra thought ruefully. 

“You comin’, Catra?” Little Adora asked, staring up at the two Catra’s with wide eyes. 

Little Catra sucked her bottom lip between her teeth, worrying it with her fang. She glanced nervously between little Adora and her older self. 

“Go on, stay with Adora. You’ve gotta keep an eye on her, right?” Little Catra nodded. “Okay, so you go with them. I’ll go do my stuff and you can tell me about the chocolate.” Little Catra nodded again, a bit more resolutely this time, and then leapt from Catra’s arms. She immediately latched on to little Adora’s hand, watching the two older woman carefully. 

“I wanna try this chocolate stuff,” she finally declared after a long moment of appraisal. 

The shorter of the two women rolled her eyes, but pointed down the hallway. 

Once the little girls were gone, Catra’s posture dropped. Adora started to reach out for her, but then thought better of it. 

“Er, Adora,” the boy prompted. 

“Right, yes, of course. Catra, if you’d follow me?” 

“Don’t think I exactly have a choice, now do I, princess?” 

“Catra, just, you know what, whatever. Just follow me.” 

As they walked through the halls of Bright Moon, Catra watched Adora. She had spent so much of her life watching Adora, always watching Adora. Shadow Weaver and other instructors used to scold her for not paying attention, but Catra never stopped. She never seemed to be able to even if she tried. 

Her thoughts drifted to the past few days. Only a few days ago, she thought that she might never see Adora again before she died. Now, she’d see Adora as she died. There was no way the Princesses would let her live after her assault on Bright Moon. She wondered, would Adora in all of her righteousness stay and watch or would she continue to be a coward and hide? 

She stumbled into Adora’s back, nearly falling to the ground. “What the….” She trailed off as a pair of guards threw open the massive doors before them. What seemed like a disproportionate amount of Bright Moon’s military lined the walls of the throne room. Where Hordak’s throne room was dark, theirs was light and fluffy, but the fundamentals were still the same. Whoever sat in the throne could stare down at their subjects, cast judgement upon them. 

Adora gestured for Catra to walk in front of her, while the boy faded into the background of the room. 

Adora’s flashy little friends paced in front of the throne in deep discussion with the queen, whose gaze was fixed on Catra. In response, Catra lifted her chin; she would not be cowed by these princesses. 

Adora stopped her some feet in front of the pair with a hand on her shoulder. A small part of Catra wanted to lean into her touch, but she quickly suppressed the urge. 

“Enough, Princess Glimmer. We will continue our discussion later.” The queen waved her daughter away. “Thank you, Adora.” 

“Of course, your majesty.” 

Catra snorted at the reverent tone in Adora’s voice. “Kiss ass,” she hissed under her breath.

“Shut up,” Adora hissed back before moving off to the side. 

Sparkles started to join her, but Adora shot her a pointed glare. Catra’s heart tensed at the look. 

“Force Captain Catra of the Horde,” the queen’s voice was far softer than she would’ve expected. She lifted her gaze to the queen, unwilling to show any weakness. 

“Quite the place you’ve got here,” Catra said, rocking back on her heels as she cast around a look. “Very fancy and, er, queenly.” 

“Force Captain Catra,” the queen began again, “I am told by my daughter that you were found in Adora’s room late last night. And that you brought two young children with you. I was not aware that the Horde used such young soldiers.” 

At that, Catra let out a loud laugh. “That’s their whole thing. Train ‘em young.” 

The queen pinned with a disapproving look. “These children, I’m told, bear a striking resemblance to both yourself and Adora. Is that correct?” 

“Yes, I found them in the Fright Zone. As far as I can tell it is Adora and me, just at age seven or so.” 

“Where did they come from?” 

“Look, lady,” she paused as she heard Adora’s sharp intake of breath, “I don’t understand all this magic crap. Personally, I think it’s all a bit flashy and unnecessary.” Another sharp breath from Adora; at least her reaction to Catra’s insubordination hadn’t changed. “All I know is those two showed up.” 

“And you brought them here? Why?” 

“Mother, it’s clearly some sort of trap!” Shimmer cut in, stepping forward. 

“And, what, Princess Glimmer, would the Horde achieve with sending a single soldier and two small children into Bright Moon?” 

The princess pouted at the question, her cheeks flushing. “Well, they’ve infiltrated our defences. And no one would suspect children.” 

“Oh, yeah, you’ve found out my brilliant plan,” Catra deadpanned, shaking her chains loudly, “All I had to do was get put into chains, that’s where it all comes together. Stars, you are thick, aren’t you?” Catra rolled her eyes. 

“Catra,” scolded Adora. 

“Why I oughta!” 

“That is enough, Glimmer,” the queen said, raising a hand imperiously. “Force Captain Catra, please answer the question, why would you bring them to your enemies?” 

Catra’s chin dipped towards her breast bone. “I figured you were best equipped to handle the whole magic thing. With, with Shadow Weaver gone, the Horde doesn’t exactly have much in the way of magic.” 

The queen looked less than impressed with her reasoning. “Truly?” 

“Cross my heart and hope to die,” Catra replied with a wink. “Look, lady, clearly something’s not right here.” There was a loud cough from Sparkles. “How about you guys fix whatever magic stuff made those two show up and I’ll be out of your hair?” She took a half step back, gesturing with both hands towards the door. “Don’t want to take up too much of your time.” 

“Mother!” Glitter yelped, full of indignation and anger. “You aren’t seriously going to let her go.” Murmurs rushed through the room. “She attacked Bright Moon! She  _ kidnapped _ me! And Bow,” she added as an afterthought.

“Glimmer!” The queen sighed heavily. “Force Captain Catra, I’m afraid that you will have to be tried for your crimes against my kingdom.” 

“Sounds like a blast,” drawled Catra, ignoring the noise from Adora. “I just want you to help those kids. I’ll submit to whatever decision you princesses decide on. I’m not important.” She shrugged one shoulder. 

Adora took a half-step towards her. “Catra, please.” 

“Right,” Catra spoke loudly over Adora, “Let’s get this over with.” She rolled over the balls of her feet, her tail whipping lazily behind her. “I was the force captain who led the invasion on Bright Moon and the one who came up with the plan. Hm, I’ve been so busy as of late, what else have I been up to?” Catra tapped thoughtfully on her chin with her chained hands. “Oh, I helped design and deploy those  _ super cool  _ robots in the forest. There was that one time where I infected Adora with that weird thing. I did drop Adora off a cliff at least once, maybe twice, it’s all a bit fuzzy,” She let out a chuckle, forcing herself to power through and definitely not look at Adora and her sad eyes. “Hm, I’ve attacked like  _ so  _ many places. They all just blur together.” 

“Catra, stop it.” 

With an eye roll, Catra continued, “I dunno what else. That should about sum it up.” She shrugged her shoulders. The silence that followed sunk in the pit of her stomach even as her heart beat painfully against her ribcage. She knew how this little episode would play out if the roles were reversed. 

“Catra….” Adora trailed off for a moment, her voice unsteady as if she might cry. 

Catra lolled her head to the side where Adora was standing. “Don’t worry, ‘Dora, I’m used to being in trouble.” Adora’s eyes went wide and shiny and stars, why did Catra’s heart hurt so badly. 

“I think you’re forgetting something,” Sparkles growled, her little hands in fists. 

“Huh? Oh, yeah, I totally threw arrow boy off a cliff that one time. That was  _ fun _ .” 

There was an indignant huff from the princess, but the queen lifted a hand for silence. “Force Captain Catra, you have given me much to think about. I will need you to testify in front of the other princesses so that we may reach an appropriate verdict.” 

Catra sighed heavily. “Well, this is all very tedious.” She yawned loudly, squeezing her eyes shut. 

“Thank you for your cooperation, Force Captain. Guards, if you would return her to the, uh, cell.” 

Two guards moved to grab Catra. Catra froze, unable to move a muscle, the sheer dread of having to return to where Shadow Weaver was. She couldn’t do it, not again, not now. 

“No, you’re not taking her back there.” There was a commotion behind her as Adora blocked the guards. 

“Adora, she’s a prisoner.” Glitter blinked to Adora’s side, grabbing Adora’s arm. Catra somewhat wanted to tear it off. Catra twisted on her heel to watch this episode play out. “We can’t exactly just leave her wandering around the castle. Guards, take her.” 

“If you lay a finger on her, I swear to Mara, Glimmer….” Huh, Adora had gotten much better at the whole menacing thing, hadn’t she? “Queen Angella, I will take personal custody of the prisoner.” 

“Personal custody?” Catra teased, wagging her eyebrows at Adora, who blushed delightfully. “That sounds fun.” 

“Catra, shut up, right now.” 

Catra pouted at Adora. She wasn’t reading too much into this little stunt. Adora just felt guilty. That was all. 

“Mother, you can’t seriously-” 

“Adora, I trust that you can manage the Force Captain?” Adora nodded quickly, tugging Catra closer by her elbow. “Then, I see no problem with Adora taking responsibility. Additionally, with the children, as Catra is the only person they know, she may be helpful in keeping them calm.”

“Great, thanks so much, Queen Angella, I really appreciate it,” Adora called over her shoulder as she dragged Catra out of the throne room. This was an old game for them. Catra getting in some sort of trouble, Adora trying to intervene, Adora dragging Catra away before she could piss someone off. 

Not that she’d admit it to anyone, but she kinda liked the warmth of Adora’s hand, the familiarity of her callouses. But again, to reiterate, she’d never admit this. 

“Hey Adora, any chance you’d take these chains off?” 

All she got was a long groan in response. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm backkkk! 
> 
> thanks to all of the super fab people who kept reviewing and sticking with it! this chapter and life kinda kicked my ass, but we're here and it's all good. 
> 
> i think it's gonna be longer than 6 chapters now, but we shall see. this chapter was meant to be more than just the cell and angella, but like we were at 6000 words, so I figured it was time to break it up. 
> 
> say hey on tumblr at avasharpest 
> 
> much love

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! 
> 
> drop me a note here or at avasharpest on Tumblr! 
> 
> i literally just watched the entire show in like two days and I have a lot^tm of feelings and so expect more fic. 
> 
> i anticipate that this will be about 3/4 chapters, but we'll see ! 
> 
> much love


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